Cursed Waters

Cancerian imagination is a Gift and a Curse

The Gravitational pull of our romanticism

Bends space-time to our

Will

But it also warps our reality in our

Sorrow

To make matters better

Or worse

A Gemini moon commands the waters that contain my Curse

All my Life, waves of unfathomable depth and height

Have utterly demolished every internal structure I’ve ever built

In Defiance

I didn’t construct them ignorant of the science

Not in resistance to physics

But rather as an appliance as opposed to a barrier

To the inevitable rising waters of emotion

In my mind, no longer bracing myself for them

But ready and willing

To ride

I couldn’t possibly predict the scale of the inner wisdom this would provide

I just it was Time

To supply all the surrender from within me that I could Find

And as soon as those tides began to rise I wouldn’t Hide

I would Glide

As if in the air. Both elements being fluids

Surely I could do it

And it has made all the difference

The burn of purged Toxins spreads and expands as I consciously narrow the

Distance

Between my deepest, present Peace and my deepest, darkest Fears

Embalmed beneath years of decomposing values that were never my own

They begin to bubble up

One by one after the Tides recede

Each Jet black bubble bursting in symphony with the last

A cacophony of insecurity

Unanswerable inquiry

Sadistic scrutiny

Jealousy

Long

Compulsive recycling of past error

And

Absolute

Existential Terror

Yet in stillness, I gaze into the Black Miasma

Utterly overcome by the spectacle

And all the more at peace

In full recognition that it is my name on the lease

For the venue of this art piece

So I resign the last remnants of my resistance to existence

I close my eyes and lean back into the pool of rot

At rest in the flesh of lifeless bodies of Being

That I

Until Now

Had cut myself off from seeing

So weightless, so freeing

That for a moment I forgot

That I ever feared those high tides that ravage my insides

And as the sea level began to rise

A smile that stretched from my mouth to my eyes

Like a light within a bulb suspended in the sky

Just above the mind

Signified

The grace in those raging waters

As they washed away the old, the False

They made room for the Dignified

The truth

For new Life, in plain sight

I travel lightly now

No baggage through which to sift

The same deep, dark waters I once considered my curse

I now fully embrace as my greatest gift