Contrition

Contrition

Brough out my best and my worst

When I close my eyes, it hurts...

To remember the mistakes I've made.

Stood by and watched it wilt

Now I sit with this guilt

Still don't know if this feeling will fade.

Never thought that a flower

Could have such a power

Warms my soul, with a simple gaze.

But the timing wasn't right

Now I'm left without sight

As I'm pulled under, by the force of the wave.

Lashing and smashing

They just keep crashing

This never ending,

Invading presence.

Though we shouldn't play with fire

I couldn't help these desires

And I lost the battle to temptation.

Couldn't find myself

Through all that I felt

Somehow left stranded, in an ocean.

And though this open sea

Is so clear to me...

My thoughts remain filled with doubt.

As I keep on swimming

A compass is spinning...

Will it point north, east, west, or south?

I think my lack of mettle

Is why it won't settle

Confused by this swirling Abyss.

The deep is always seductive

But it's so unproductive...

To HOLD ON to a single wish.

My burdens weigh me down

If I hold on, I may drown

But the thought of letting go, feels the same.

So... Can I survive

These thunderous tides?

Keep my head afloat... while remaining sane.

So I'll try to find my bearings

Even though I'm wearing

This pain and regret on my sleeve.

The only thing left to do

Is move forward and keep true

To my instincts... and what my heart

BELIEVES