Can You See Me Now
By: Karlton A. Armistad
[ Dedicated to Every Sista out there, taken too soon for being Different, no Special]
My room is dark, as dark as caverns of torture that infect the roots of my West Indian Mango Tree, Me. As I stare at the plain ceiling cloaked in waves of shadows cast by my black out drapes, I let my emotions like oceans and oceans of untapped pain tremble my very core. Robbed of any true identity, I’ve spent My whole life fighting. Fighting to breath, to stand, to be supported, remembered and not abandoned. Still; I have to ask with my loudest silent voice, can you see me now?
Running, swiftly calculated sprinting as if I stop, it will be, by a piercing bullet in Me ....I’ll drop and they will win, persecuting me for no other sin than being born and treated with disgust, disdain & scorn all because they can’t fit me into their prescribed norm. So that means I must die, ‘Boom-Bye-Bye inna Batty Bwoy head’ they chant these deranged psychopaths, aiming to claim my life. ‘Rude-Bwoy nah promote nuh nasty man, him if haffi dead’. I still don’t even know truly who I am, but you don’t give a damn, no seriously, can you..see Me?
You’ve damaged me, raped me, crushed me, tortured me even tried to abort me, still I stand up, pray up and stay up because you don’t or can’t see my purpose, my life, my strife and my challenges to be acknowledged, admonished , what I am blessed to do will leave You and my enemies Astonished. My worth will not be defined by your hate, and by the time I have done what I came to do, it’ll be more fool you..for being late, not seeing.. Me.
Shine, blindingly shine is what I’ll do, for the hundreds of thousands of Me you robbed of their journeys with your one track mind, that made you eternally blind to the rich and continuous talent that came with my ‘kind’. Never you mind which side of the pearly gates I’ll be on, you and your hate just…keep movin-on.
There’s room for forgiveness on the blessed boat, but you gotta say it and pray it , I need to hear those words leave your throat…’sorry I should have known better, hurting you was never gonna make me a man, as that was never God’s plan'. And as you lay your prejudice bare, your vision returns and guess who’s standing there?
[ “I am trying to show the world we are all Human Beings, and that colour is not important. What is important is the quality of our work… from the acclaimed FX TV Series, Pose]
About the Creator
Carlton A. Armistad is the pseudonym for Andrew R. Little. I prefer writing under this as it allows me to look at any body of work I complete separate to my personal day-to-existence, and safeguards my relationships and family.