Burden

I take back all the tears I’ve wasted on you. I regret all the years I spent pretending to be someone else. Metamorphosing into a shadow of my former self. A mannequin has more spark than me. Naïveté blesses you when you’re young. The saints conspire while my life plays out in from of me. Drunken protests transform into sluggish indifference. Apathy doesn’t care. Ambition gave up a long time ago. Surrender to the ether: it will mold you into perfection. The epitome of a dream but whose dream? I’ve played the role, I’ve performed my duties. I’ve acquiesced over and over again. Am I the villain? For wanting something more, something less? Your supremacy is not my cup of tea. I wasn’t happy alone, I’m not happy with u. I may never be happy. I try to levitate, I try to elevate. Unoccupy yourself. Unburden yourself from someone else’s goals. Obstacles and barriers are in the shape of marriage and kids. There is no benefit in letting yourself get carried away. Who knew being reckless once would lead to depressing consequences? This is a battle I don’t know if I can win. God isn’t here to save me. I won’t meet the Devil at the crossroads. There is no holy deliverance. I have to save myself