Broken Fast

I was an egg blistered to dust on the pavement

Waiting for you to pick up the spatula

Pick me up

Show me I'm not just your refuse

Show me I'm worth any words at all

Show me that one day I too will be loved

Instead of lying on the pavement

Waiting for you to show your face

Lying on the pavement getting more and more bruised

Watching people put on ballet slippers and crocks

Boots and fucking kleats

Walk all over me

Spikes in my forehead and dust in my eyes

And when I say "can you watch where you're walking?"

"You stepped on my hand

And my face

My spleen and my heart

That hurts, and I thought you cared

So be careful"

They tell me "it's hard to be walking on eggshells.

You should understand."

Well now, I do.

I understand who shows care

Versus willful ignorance to someone else's pain

I understand that I waited for you

And now I pay the toll for the time that you wasted.

I understand that you were a parasite,

etching away at parts of me

that only the Universe can properly see

Burrowing deep

Unraveling threads

And throwing me

An egg on the sidewalk

I understand you may have always been a beautiful lie.

I understand pain

and choosing myself when you're not here to choose me

Or even choose to fucking communicate when you had the damn chance

And I understand that now, it's my job to scrape myself back up off the sidewalk

And see how much time can be salvaged

If you're the one thrown away