Before the rainbow

My anxiety can be

Red, I can’t see past the present, so my tears are not silent My screams are stuck in my throat But they soon come out, like I’ve been hit with a belt Whiffs, coarse sighs, and heavy breaths.

My anxiety can be

Orange, ambition mixed with fear Consumed by my own insecurities Held back by reflections of my past failures I want to get there, but I know I won’t I’m almost there, but I know I couldn’t.

My anxiety can be

Yellow, a bright sun that will soon end Pessimism with no form of escape Can’t live in the moment, can’t go with the flow How can I enjoy the sun when what comes next, I always know.

My anxiety can be

Green, I’m productive but too productive The voices whisper in my ears You should be anxious because you’re not anxious Everything is fine so something must be wrong Life can never be this sweet, it won’t last long.

My anxiety can be

Blue, a mild form of sorrow creeping in Subtly and gently, silent sobs in my white sheets Days where the sunlight burns, a gloomy night in Stuck with the dangers of retrospection No tangible reasons for my dejection.

My anxiety can be

Indigo, melancholy in a lighter shade I have finally gotten through to some friends, but I’m not present The dark shadows of my mood haunts me like a ghost with a story to tell They ask if I’m alright, so I put on a smile, and my nose is so close to my lip, it’s unable to smell.

My anxiety can be

Violet, on these days beauty eludes me I put on my favourite dress but it’s too tight I hate my wonky nose, it doesn’t look right I don’t have a pretty face, so my future is not bright.