Afraid to Feel

Disguised in positivity

Spirituality; sophisticated clever escape

Can never relate

Too deeply from my body

Cause my soul isn’t free

I've been running from feeling

Unable to unleash the stormy sea crashing in me

Like I said the waves are intense

Immense

Insurmountable mountains of lies and distrust

Inner disgust

Towards mainly myself

A living hell that constantly shifts and makes me sick

'Cause I can barely keep up with it

Life sucking entity...

It breeds and feeds off of grief and fear

The shape shifting of faces begins as I awake

But if I just stay

Just stay in one place

Here.

Now.

Completely still...

I end the chase in an INSTANT.

Sillyratracealwayspacinganticipatingfate

And time STOPS.

It all comes crashing down

And I can see clear for once

Eternal love

Overrides the mentality of scarcity that has me dancing like a lifeless puppet

Slave to its strings

Past lives ties of hard times

Of being poor, torn, and worn out

Incapable of finding my way

So I stop

For a moment...

And I am home.

Away from the solemn prison of pain

Lurking just beneath the surface

Always ready to play