A Lifetime Review

I read a saying on Facebook recently that really hit home. it was something along the lines of : 

When you look back on your life, the one person you will owe the biggest apology to, is yourself!

That saying inspired this poem.

I often sit and ponder, the days that have fled,

The days of my childhood and into my youth,

I sift through the memories, wondering if I need to forgive,

There’s people I’ve wronged if I was to tell the truth.

***

If I was to go back and tell them I’m sorry,

Would they accept I was too little to know,

Or have they forgotten my wrongs,

Within their life’s constant flows?

***

I ransack my teen years, some of them ever so good,

But I get hooked on the losses, could I have made better choices,

Would those I love believe I was doing the best I absolutely could,

Or would they not listen to my apologies or my regretful voices?

***

Memories of young adulthood are tough to rifle,

Some of my darkest days exist locked up tight,

The days that I struggled and almost gave up,

To the days where I buckled down and put up a fight.

***

Do I need to say sorry for those dark days,

Would anyone hear anything I’ve got to say,

I truly regret any pain I caused,

But it was never just black and white, as we coloured the days grey.

***

Motherhood memories are an absolute delight,

Although there’s plenty that I did do wrong,

I tried to be the best mum I possibly could be,

But I was never trained to be a parent, I just tried to stay strong.

***

I’m mostly an empty nester now, spending time alone,

With my boys fully grown,

I’ve attempted at times to apologise for any hurt and tears,

But they humble me by saying, I’ve not wronged them, that they’ve ever known.

***

I think I’m a little wiser now the years are stacking up,

And the one major lessons I’m learning as I ponder my review,

I owe myself the biggest apology for all I’ve done wrong in my life,

As I’ve been my own worst enemy, more than a time or two!

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Originally posted on Medium