17 Type of Shit

The things we believe at 17 especially when they come from cute boys with green eyes their words we get hypnotized.

Knowing most likely at the end of the day they are just lies to get into our hearts and in between our thighs but at 17 you don't think.

You say you love them and you don't even blink, you say it back without really knowing what it means, without feeling what it means to be in love, you're only 17.

So naïve, so innocent, so insecure, so unsure you believed that there wasn't another her. That you're the only girl who holds onto a piece of his heart.

That you ignore all the red flags and other horrendous parts until the day comes were he breaks your young heart.

Now let's fast forward to 22, you're rose-colored glasses broke in two so you turned one part into a monocle

You see parts of the world that are bearable but I see the bullshit that is unfixable because when I was 17 I was high on the I need you type shit too,

The I can't live without you type shit, the "my world has to revolve around you" type shit. The "you can't leave me" type shit, "I'll always be alone and never will be able to make it on my own" type shit,

That will always be the shit that gets stuck in my head because I got so busy trying not to be like everyone who has hurt me, or left me that I forgot how to be like me.

And get high on "myself" type shit instead and realize that is the good shit, the "this is me" type shit, the "I'm broken and it's okay not to be strong everyday" type shit.

The "it's ok to be who I am" type shit because I am stronger than the person I was and every day I get wiser than the person I used to be and that's the type of shit I need to be.

11-27-17