12 Days

I sit all alone

In my living room

Awake at 4 am

The sound of metal thronging outside

Somewhere nearby

Interrupts my slumber

Grinding grinding grinding

In sync with the throbs

Of my most recent headache.

Who am I? Awake and in pain

at this awful hour.

Nobody to you.

The noise outside seems indicative

Of some larger world problems,

Drawing nearer to my fort.

What do I know,

I am just a voter.

The noise is louder, coming closer.

My stomach rumbles an announcement

So I change the channel, to silence

I’m just a voter

I did my job.

I watched and I waited,

While I studied the world

From all of my screens

Inside my safe cave.

I watched and I read

And learned what I needed

To make the informed choice

That everyone says

Is my civic duty.

I raised my concerns

And shared my own questions

With my inner circle.

I formed my own opinion

About what was right

And what seemed best

For me, for everyone.

And when I was asked

To share my feelings publicly—

On paper, in person, today,

That is when I performed.

I cast my vote.

This nobody had a voice!

But now,

I sit alone in the dark, afraid.

I can’t go outside,

I might get sick and die.

Or, I might make you sick

And you might die.

I have a whole drawer

Devoted to masks, gloves,

And sanitizer, just in case

I need to find you up close.

I’ve been alone here so long

That even my dreams

Are six feet apart

Still I do what I’m told

It’s no fun but it’s right

To sit alone and hope

That the people who rule the world

Will bring me some change.

I sit on the shelf, wondering

Is this my final duty?

To pray I won’t expire

Before my time?

I’m just a voter—

I still need to eat.

On occasion, I must brave

contaminated tundra

Outside the safe zone.

This isn’t often,

(I’m one of the lucky ones)

But out I must go

To hunt for resources,

Try to live another day or

Week, month, year,

To be ready and able

to vote again

When next I’m called!

... I return home

As fast as I can

To scrub off with hard soap

The disease I just rubbed up against,

In fear of spread

And when I’m satisfied,

Disinfected and sated,

I sit alone quietly again, and wonder

When will this all end?

I’m tired of amusing myself;

A slave to WiFi and

Learning new tricks

To occupy mind and body

While the great wait lingers on,

or until such time when my leaders

Find cures for all the ailments

Of the world.

The more I sleep

The more tired I become!

Rest has become torture,

An almost-death. Please,

Please let me live!

But I’m just a voter

Now stripped of everything

Save only one right:

To vote.

Until such an event,

When I may be needed again

To have a voice,

To share my one vote,

here I am... still

Alone and afraid

In pain, grief, mourning,

Deteriorating

And waiting

Tick, tock.

Bang!

Just when I thought

And became resolute

That life could not become

More Desolate,

Hope arrived

A tiny pinprick.

An injection of pure magic!

Might this turn the tide?

Get in line, hurry!

But not you, not yet.

You’re just a voter

Go home, wash your hands

Wear your mask, and

Do not go to school

To work

To church

To restaurants

To lovers

Just, stay.

We’ll go first.

You stay quiet

Don’t call us

We’ll call you

I take another handful

Tylenol, Advil, maybe more,

And apply a warm compress

To my aching ______

(Fill in the blank.)

Ok, I do what I’m told.

I’m just a voter, is all.

I suppose I should be grateful

For pain, for the underlying fear

makes it easier

To stay where they tell me

And hold keep in my place all alone

Where I belong.

The thronging has stopped.

It’s 6 am whatever day —

my cave is still.

But I cannot rest, not yet...

How long do I have

Until a mob appears

To tear down my walls?

Why can’t my leaders see

The world has been destroyed.

There’s nothing left here,

No promises, no hope

But worry and wait for

what else may come to us

In front of death.

What is our safety worth

If every second is spent

In fear that the net will disappear?

Twelve more endless days?!

I’m just a voter.

And I voted!

Against the madness!

yet here I sit

Alone, tired, afraid, hurting

and continuing

To go mad