You're Not Alone

Life can really suck sometimes. Sometimes you find yourself more lost than you ever thought possible and so you sit in front of your computer with tears running down your cheeks because life can get really hard.

If I've learned anything over the past few days of my life, it's that struggling is a part of being human, scratch that, the past few years of my life. The truth is even though you may be sitting in your bedroom alone with tears running down your cheeks doesn't really mean that you're alone. Everyone is struggling, and isn't it kind of beautiful that we aren't alone in that too?

At this very moment as I sit on my bed, typing away, tears in my eyes, there's someone else doing that same thing someplace else in the world. Someone else who finds themselves more lost than they ever knew possible and are seeking comfort in someone's else's words and thoughts.

Or they’re typing their own emotions and fears, finding solace in the black and white warmth of their screen and trying to find a glimmer of hope in a moment of hopelessness.

They may even be struggling with something else entirely, they may have different issues and challenges then I myself do, but they feel lost too. Maybe feeling really lost is a part of life and struggling and finding the right thing for yourself. Maybe being lost is the way to the right path.

If you had asked me at the age of 18 what I thought my life would be at the age of 24, I would not have said one thing that I am currently doing. I had always thought that things would be figured out, that I would have a career paved out, a boyfriend or husband, and maybe a little apartment or townhouse for us and our dog. But life could give two shits about what you think your future should be.

Maybe life thinks that at the age of 24 you're going to be jobless, in a bachelor apartment with a cat that you never wanted and was kinda put on you and you're alone. Alone in the significant other sense. You've lost your footing, cause the truth is you never took the time to find it.

When I graduated I took the first job two weeks out of the window and the truth is, I never liked the job in the first place. I hated it and I was awful at it and I am sure that came through in my work. I took it, cause I wasn't sure there would ever be anything else and the truth is that's not really true.

I'm struggling and I'm fighting. Struggling to find the right path for myself and my future. Fighting to find my way in the world, one step at a time. And you and I, aren't alone in that either.

When you’re 18, you think you have your whole life ahead of you. You think that during those 6 years, you’ll figure it all out. Those things will fall into place and just work.

I think that maybe the universe as a better plan for us that we never even knew we wanted or needed, even if that plan involves a whole lot of struggling and anxiety and some sleepless nights. I think that things aren’t supposed to turn out the way that you wanted or had always envisioned.

And the thing about that is, we're all struggling. Maybe it's struggling with your job, your relationship, your living arrangement, or lack there of-of any of the above. Everyone is fighting for or against something.

Maybe the universe as a plan in place for us that's going to involve a whole lot more then we wanted. Maybe that plan involves you sitting on your bed with tears running down your cheeks, typing away.