Why It’s Okay to Break the Mold

Who am I? This is a question that is of concern to all of us at times, especially when people around us are constantly trying to answer the question.

How do we stay faithful to ourselves in a world that always tries to do something for us?

I can tell you that it is not easy.

I work as a full-time police officer in a busy department. In the police service, everything has to be in order, and there is a value system in place. Personally I see the police system being based on one big theme, and everyone is expected to go along with this mold:

Command is more important than communication.

This is a place where I have done a good job of making myself lost.

You see, I chose to join a career skill when a career belief system contradicts mine.

I genuinely care about people, and I value communication more than anything else in my work. I prefer to speak instead of shouting, and then ask instead of telling.

My approach to this work is very different from almost everyone else in my work.

I also realized that I tend to be more progressive when I interact with people, and I get into situations that are more conflicting than the people I work with. What happened?

The fact is, people would go to great lengths to comply with their “rules.” Because the police world is such a powerful culture, there is a lot of pressure to follow and breaking established “rules” is very illegal.

It can be frustrating sometimes to stay loyal to yourself in a place where everyone expects you to be something else.

We've already seen that it's hard and uncomfortable to be different, so why not just imitate? Mold exists for a reason, right?

I can't answer that question, but I can tell you that the mold didn't work for me.

Let me explain why.

The reason I do things the way I do is because there are people who need and trust me to be honest with me. The last thing the country needs is one overpowered police officer.

Don't be too afraid to paint outside the line so you never pick up your crayon!

You have a unique idea for giving what no one else does, so share it!

I can't tell you how many thank you calls I received for my openness and helpfulness at work. All because I choose to do things differently.

I have helped change people's lives by simply being honest with myself. I have come across people who other officials have not been able to do because I am not the same size as the mold. I promise you, nothing feels better than following the path in your heart.

Know I do not say that my way is better than the other way. I just share that the way I present myself to work has proven to be very important to others.

And it is important that you know that being honest with yourself means that you can be honest with others. That's right!

When there is no conflict in human relationships it usually means that one person is risking his or her beliefs in some way. A little argument is natural; accept it and learn from it.

There is a kind of catch that comes with breaking the mold anyway.

It is by no means an easy road and you will face some difficulties. At least I know I have it.

What can you expect if you choose to break the mold?

Will you be ridiculed? You bet

Misunderstanding? Count on it.

Dismissed? Most likely

And everything will be fine. For the people you help and for your happiness in life, there is no other way. You have to be honest with yourself, anyway.

I had insulted posters made of me and put them on the job and I was publicly ridiculed for my way of doing things by other police officers. I have been told on many different occasions going to the scene with violent people "Why don't you just kiss me"… as if I don't understand that the world is not that simple.

This is the price I pay to stay true to myself, and I smile and carry it. Because every time someone tells me that I was the only one who was really listening to them, and that I made a difference in their lives, it makes all of that worthwhile.

My lifestyle has been difficult, but it also benefits me equally. I chose not to compromise my beliefs just to be accepted, and I would gladly do so again.

The choice is up to you.

If you choose to break the mold, I give you some advice to help you find your way:

1. Know who you are and what you stand for.

Without a clear view of who he is, it will be difficult to survive the pressure and ridicule. Know them better. Spend some time meditating, writing down your feelings, and organizing your thoughts before making major decisions.

2. Try not to take things for granted.

What you should be aware of is that people attack what they do not understand. It’s not that they don’t like you or don’t like you; it's that they don't understand what you stand for.

Note that the attack is not personal, no matter how it sounds. The people who attack you are simply defending their views, because what they represent makes them question their values.

3. Be aware that you are unique and important, regardless of what people around you say.

Your opinion and how you work are just as important as everyone else!

Once you've started on your way, never go back. Walk with your head up and down, knowing that you have never done anything wrong.