Why Giving to Others Is Also Giving to Ourselves

I stood at the library counter waiting to check out a pile of books when I overheard a woman who was working overtime explain to a librarian why her books were so drunk.

“My employer demands that I leave home after work. It is a miracle that I did it on time to pick up my daughter from kindergarten, ”she said.

“Is he your helper?” asked the librarian.

"No, I'm a legal assistant," the woman explained. “But employment is hard, and if I don't do extra work, I could lose my job. I can't choose from this economy. ”

I understood the woman. Years ago, when my children were young, I did extra work because I needed money and because I could not say no. I contacted her story and wanted to do something to let her know she was not alone.

But what can I give her?

The desire to give generously to others was not to be taken lightly. I had learned years ago from watching others give it to me when I was not in a position to give it back to them.

I searched my wallet and found two tickets for a movie that I had received overtime. I left my literature at the counter and followed the woman and her baby outside.

"I'm sorry," I said. “I could not hear your conversation about work. I understand what you are going through because I have been through it myself, and I want you to know that I appreciate you even if your boss does not. ”

I gave him tickets. I said: “Take your daughter to the movie.

Her eyes widened and she burst into tears. "Thank you," he said. "You just made my church."

That little act of solidarity, understanding, and generosity made me feel so close to a woman as I could reach out to my 22-year-old man who worked long hours without thanking many ungrateful managers just to help my family survive.

PBS special, "This Emotional Health," explores the healing power of voluntary and generous giving.

Studies show that when people have enough to meet their needs, more money and time do not add to their happiness. Only then can the donor pay extra and the donor's happiness is increased.

According to Emma M. Seppala, Ph.D., people benefit by contributing through communication with others.

People have a built-in need for communication, reunion, and consultation. In a world that is becoming more and more dependent on technology, the gift of devotion increases intimacy and reduces the risk of loneliness.

Giving waves to the sea like a stone in the deep waters. It connects us in a physical way. It makes us realize that we are not alone.

Giving does not have to be complicated or overwhelming. It can be an encouraging smile or a gentle kiss. Fifteen minutes of careful listening can be as important as a one-hour massage.

After all, it is not how much we give, but how we give.

If we give from the heart, in the desire to connect, then we take the ordinary event and make it special, which is very different when we give to a greater purpose because of a commitment or to see ourselves as important.

You also do not need to have a formal program of volunteerism or giving to receive the benefits of giving. It can become a habit that you develop over time and become an integral part of your life.

Start by paying close attention to people you meet during the day. Soon you will see an opportunity to donate.

If you leave a crowded parking lot and notice someone driving around looking for a place, you can show that person to take your parking space.

If you see a frustrated waiter striving to meet your table requirements, you can leave a great tip to show your gratitude. When you see someone walking around with a permanent smile, you can light up your comforting smile and light up a little light on a black person’s heart.

Giving is not limited to strangers. You could grow a neighbor's garden, prepare a meal for your parents, or visit a stranger for a while. Giving to those you know and love very much prevents you from taking them for granted.

The confusing product of giving freely out of compassion and love is how you make the giver feel. The more you donate from an unconditional donation, the happier you feel. Giving makes you realize how much you have the power to make others feel better about themselves and their lives.

Go out and give whatever you have to anyone who needs it. Look for common moments and make them unique. Life is a special time