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What I'm planning to do for 2021

I never make New Year resolutions but if I write it out maybe I'll believe it to be an affirmation.

By Brian AnonymousPublished 3 years ago 4 min read
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I've never been known to make New Years resolutions because they never really pan out. In addition, I don't like to put that much pressure on myself throughout the year. Why put this goal on yourself that you know you're supposed to do anyways? If something is important for you to become a better person you should be doing it no matter what. You shouldn't have to have a resolution to do something like that. If it's a resolution then you're just doing it for that year and then you won't be doing it anymore.

Then I think back about the last year in 2020. I realize there is something that I did want to do for the past few years. There's been so many excuses for me to quit and I never fulfilled my goal. Maybe resolutions are needed. Sometimes you need a little kick in the butt by yourself to get things done.

In the past 20 years I've been dancing but I've always kept it on the safe side for the longest time. Living in a smaller city there isn't that big push to make yourself world elite because I never had that big desire to do something like that. I loved different aspects of the dance that people oversee a lot like footwork and subtle movements to help you tell a story.

When I got into my late 30's I realized that my body isn't what it used to be. I guess you can say that I realized that the dance I do has a shelf life and I don't see myself learning some of the bigger moves when get older. It's either now or never. So I started to learn bigger more acrobatic movements. It was tough to be learning this part of the dance at such an advanced age. Usually kids in their 20's are the ones learning these things but I took more time than others to gain confidence in the abilities of my own body.

At 40 I now know I really got to get this going. No more dilly dallying. Last year was the year I was supposed to get this move called a flare. The move is basically a move where I would be balancing on my arms and cycle my legs around my body in some sort of infinity motion. I was getting it in the last two years but there have been things that kept getting in my way. In some ways I used them as signs that the move wasn't meant to be for me.

At the beginning of 2019 I was able to do maybe 2 rotations of the move. I was lucky if I got more. It wasn't perfected. I then got into a car accident. I was out of commission for a while and I had to go through physiotherapy to push my body to get back into dance shape.

It was absolutely frustrating trying to get my body to learn how to do flares again. I was about to get it close to the end of 2019. I was feeling stronger finally and I had just finished my rehabilitation. Then another car decided to drive into me and I was taken out of commission once again.

This second accident was even worse because this time I was riding a bike and the car destroyed me and I suffered from a bad concussion. I was extremely worried that my dance days were over. There was a bit of depression because a whole bunch of things had happened me at the same time.

I crawled into 2020 with a limp and it didn't help that more things happened such as the pandemic and a bunch of losses. Things were getting overwhelming but I realized that I pulled myself together once and I could do it again. 2020 was the best time to put myself back together because there wasn't really anything else to do. I'd rather fix myself than mope around and see myself get worse.

By the end of 2020 I felt that my body had become much stronger and I started to dance again but I was still too scared to do certain moves. My brain was still fragile because of the concussion I sustained from the second accident. There's the added stipulation that I tended to get nauseous if my heartrate went past a certain beats per minute. It was hard to keep working on my body when I knew I was going to get sick doing it. I still pushed myself to do it because I loved dance that much.

So this year I have to push myself. 40 years old and relearning an acrobatic move like the flare is a daunting task but I believe I can do it! I've kind of had it before, it's just that I have to tell myself to keep at it despite being at home. There has to be different ways I can practice this move and get it perfected.

So that's what I'm going to work on in 2021. It's going to open up so many possibilities in my dance if I get it. I can't lie, my friends will be really impressed that I was able to pull it off while quarantined as well. I'm sure I'll be able to hit this goal and I'll feel so satisfied when I get it!

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About the Creator

Brian Anonymous

I have tons of opinions that change constantly. I watch a lot of movies and play video games. There are some articles on my struggles with languages and dance as well.

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