What Defines "Doing Wrong?"

“Sort your life out, and if you don’t know where to start, start by stop doing the things that you know are wrong.” - Dr Jordan B Peterson

Well, when you think of the things that you are doing that are considered wrong I am sure there are at least a couple of things that you are doing that are stupid. How stupid doesn’t really matter to a sense. But on this topic, what defines stupid? People do all sorts of crazy things. Take a group of miscreants who trespass onto some land. They don’t cause any trouble, just go where they are not supposed to go. Now take a different group, who trespass but cause damage. The difference is obvious, but both would be considered stupid things because they are where they are not supposed to be. I am asking however, what is the line between what counts as the stupid things you should stop? The ideal scenario is that everybody stops doing “stupid” things. But then the world wouldn’t be real. So how do you distinguish between what you should or shouldn’t do in terms of your own stupidity? This is my interpretation on the matter.

I am fairly young and so in some senses considered “young and naive”. I know in some senses I am, but compared to a lot of people my age I am not. I know a lot of what I am, I have a greater understanding than most of my peers. This does not justify the stupid things I do, this does not make me better than anyone else either. It simply means I feel I can talk confidently about the matter due to what (I think) I know. Life is a series of stages, challenges, actions and consequences. The challenges we face differ all the time. No two problems are the same, they have similarities, but are not the same. How they present themselves and how we deal with them defines the experience, and how we act after that defines what we have learnt from it. I am going to talk on a personal level, from my perspective and share with you as much as I am willing to share. My work life is great, I feel I am doing well. My personal life, has become a lot more sociable recently, and some of my actions and activities undermine the progress of myself. Some might say. Right now I see it more as a development, what I am doing is not considered good. Well, what is considered good? Something that produces a positive result. Going out with friends to wherever, means you are out enjoying life's experiences, if you enjoy yourself that is. Helping someone out is a good thing. Talking to people is a good thing. It obviously doesn't stop there, and sometimes it isn't as black and white as we would like it to be. Sometimes we do things and don't talk about it, the whole “let sleeping dogs lie” kind of tale. This technically doesn’t cause a problem if it remains quiet, but at the same time it isn’t considered a good thing because it doesn’t help things progress in a positive way. In Dr. Peterson's book one of the rules is “Tell the truth - or, at least, don’t lie.” So if you feel you can’t tell people your actions, you have to hide from them, then it can probably be considered a bad thing. Now I am not saying you have to share openly everything you do, I think you know very well what I mean. But this still doesn’t answer what I think are the stupid things you should stop doing.

I only have a part answer to my statement. As I said, each problem is different. A different story, a different solution, a different lesson. They come in all shapes and sizes, so by starting at the recurring issues that always get you into trouble or at least don’t give you a good name for it, that is something stupid you should stop. I don’t know what that is for you, but you might be finding yourself in a similar situation all too often that you might not consider to be positive. Do you know why you are in this situation? What are the telltale signs it is about to happen again? The best cure for something is prevention. So if you know what trap you keep falling into, maybe you should backtrack a little to see at what point you can recognise things not going entirely your way. Not easy. I won’t say it is “that simple”.

The second element I would like to point out is our undeniable attraction to trouble, curiosity and our disliking of the unknown. All too often this leads to troubles of the most fantastic variety. Some a little more disastrous. This curiosity of landing yourself in trouble is slightly different to what I think Dr Peterson means when he says stop doing stupid things. Partly. It is impossible to stay clear of trouble, no matter how hard you try. How involved in said trouble though is a little more in your control. Arguably the whole thing is in your control but that would be naive of me to say you can always prevent getting yourself into trouble. This is where I struggle to differentiate in his statement. I know right now some of the things I am doing that are wrong. However they are only wrong because society doesn’t agree with it. The consequences it could have if it grabs a hold of me is quite severe. So I wouldn’t say that right now it is a problem, I would also argue that it isn’t entirely stupid. The action itself is not stupid. My reactions and how I behave after, defines the whether or not it is stupid. To me. I know there are some people who would say I was stupid for even doing it. Some, a small minority but some, would accept it. Probably because they themselves do not conform with society, or they accept it in their world. That small minority is probably bigger than you think, or certainly what people like to believe. I have learnt that recently, that the world is actually not as “good” as people would like to believe. But certain media elements make sure we don’t learn that, or at least, find it hard to believe or accept. I feel that sometimes you have to go through something extremely difficult, to then come out the other side and be a lot wiser for it, and see reality for what it is rather than a sugar coating that people lay over things. I have learnt a lot this past month about the world that is hidden, and how, I am not so alone in my experiences.

So to finish up, I know this piece was not as clear and/or concise as it should be for this kind of topic. This is my first piece I have written and published about said topic, so I am interested to see how this develops over time, and what my answer would look like if I wrote it again further on down the line. It would be quite nice to “sort out my life”. And to stop the stupid things I am doing in order to help and comply with that statement. But at the same time, there are a few “stupid” things I don’t think I need to stop doing, yet. What thing(s) do you think you should stop doing, in order to start/help get your life on track?