Well, If You Want My Opinion...

I met someone last year that described herself as 'the Oprah of her generation'. This evidenced a tremendous amount of confidence, especially as her message was still in progress and her generation was largely unaware that she existed. Still; I understand the urge to share your knowledge and experience with those around you.

For instance, I am a veritable Ben Franklin in the morning. I carry on a running stream of poignant quips and pointed corrections during the morning commute. Such enriching lessons as "That's what a turn signal is for, you muddled dolt", and "Green still means 'go' here in the U.S. of A." could change the world were I to record them and distribute the content to well, let's start with Eastern Michigan and then move out to the world at large.

Brighten the corner where you are, I always say.

Other locations where the wisdom seems to well up to the surface include:

• grocery stores ( scan the code... the code... the thing with all the black lines close together... the code, scan it!)

• Secretary of State, or the DMV for those outside of Michigan ( You've called 72 three times and no one has answered... move on to the next number... next number, say it!)

• theaters ( we will all enjoy this better if you stop kicking the back of my seat, sucking your teeth, and spilling pop on the floor to trickle into my shoes.)

• watching house hunting shows (take the worst house of the block, it has better resale potential... not the one with the pool, don't take the pool, not the pool! Dummy, you took the pool and we still have 25 minutes left in the show. That pool is going to COST you....)

• standing at the elevator with a group of people ( hmmm. did they press the button? probably yes, they were waiting before I got here. But I didn't SEE them press the button. What if they didn't press the button? I could press it once, and the elevator will arrive. I can be the hero. I can press it just once, press it the right way!)

• seeing a crooked picture in a public place (They MUST not know it is crooked. If they did they would have fixed it. If they notice it they will be embarrassed. I'll just nudge it a bit and get it level, no one is watching...)

My informed helpfulness has no bounds. Well, almost no bounds. There is someone that I hesitate to tackle. Someone that doesn't seem to appreciate my running monologue of why-not-do-it-this-way?

Me.

Oh, I can dish the advice. Pitch it like a champ. See the opportunity you have overlooked. Provide an opinion on your quandary?  Of, course; just ask.

But I have a problem looking into the mirror and mining that claim for gold. Maybe, if I change my focus, and I squint a little, I can pretend I don't know the person looking back at me. I can walk farther away from the trees and see the forest.

I have puh-lenty of things that I can point out to myself, lots of room for improvement. It's just not as satisfying as pointing out the faults (real or imagined) of others. It's so much easier to point out ways that others can live up to my expectations than it is to really knuckle down and work on myself.

I've tried to make changes, you know? But it is HARD to change. Especially when I have even less tolerance for my own mistakes and failures than I do for the imagined issues of others. Perhaps, perhaps I can start by being a little kinder. Take the emotion out of the situation and, just maybe, I can practice what I preach to others. Maybe I should take another glance into the mirror and see if my brand of motivational encouragement works on me. Then maybe I'll be ready for my own show on the Oprah Winfrey Network.

If you enjoyed this, or are simply glad that you don't need to listen to my advice, please click on the heart below!