The Life That You Desire, And The Goals That You Dream Of

Are you disappointed with the life you are living at the moment? Unhappy in your relationship? Hating your job? Stressed about your financial situation? Unsatisfied with the way you look and feel? Disappointed with your overall lifestyle? Don't worry if you answered yes to any, or all, of these questions, because you would actually be far from the only person to be feeling this disappointment, dissatisfaction, and unhappiness. You only need to look at social media to see the number of people who have nothing else better to do in their life but whinge and complain about something, be it about their life itself, or something else. You only need to go as far as your workplace to see the number of people who are constantly whinging and complaining about their job, their boss, the company they work for, the customers, their fellow workmates, or their life in general also. In fact, you probably may not even need to leave your home at all, to gauge the unhappiness, dissatisfaction, and disappointment that people are feeling in their life right now, as it may be your own partner, parents, children, or housemates who are constantly moody, and always whinging and complaining. There are always those individuals who love to keep up appearances, and pretend that their life is all lollipops and rainbows, when deep down, they are feeling unhappy, miserable, unsatisfied, and even depressed. Being someone who has, and still is, battling depression, I hate appearing in public as being depressed and unhappy, so I've always concealed these feelings. At my former job, I even had customers commenting about how unbelievably happy and jovial I was all the time, and how they believed I truly loved my job, when in reality, I hated my life and my job with a passion. Don't be fooled into thinking that people are loving their life, and that nothing is wrong in their life, because the majority of people who actually say this, and display this sense of great happiness, are actually bluffing. That's why it's crucial that we always treat others with care and respect, because we don't truly know what is going on in their life. The fact of the matter is, most people are unhappy and unsatisfied with their life, and there is one major reason for this. Most people aren't living the life they desire, nor are they close to achieving their goals.

So why are so many people unhappy, and why are so many people not achieving their goals? Well, there are a range of factors, of course, but all of them actually come down to the individual themselves. There's always that three headed monster I often talk about, being fear, doubt, and laziness. When it comes to opportunities and the pursuit of one's goals, many people are fearful of proceeding with the pursuit, because they are worried they will fail, they will lose financially, they will embarrass themselves, they will be criticized and judged by others, or they won't know what they are doing. Maybe they doubt they have the required skills, abilities, prerequisites and knowledge to achieve success. Perhaps they are simply just too lazy to get stuck into the actions that are working towards their goals, and they lack the willpower to make certain sacrifices in their life. There is another crucial success killer and dream destroyer however, that being influence. Influence can come from two different channels, the first being other people. Society has manufactured this "how to live your life" model in which so many people have been sucked into following, not realizing that they are sacrificing their happiness and goals in the process. It's that good old pathway of going from birth, to school, to college/university, to finding a corporate job, to getting married, to buying a house, to having kids, to paying off debt, to retirement, to death. It's the apparent non-negotiable blueprint as to how life should be. Step out of this model, and you are frowned upon basically. If you dare start your own business, you are deemed to be abnormal and foolish, as society has created the perception that all businesses fail. If you don't get married you are classed as being selfish, a loner, unlovable, or perhaps frigid. If you don't go to university, you're classed as being dumb, and destined for a dead end job all your life. If you haven't got the gist, basically if you do anything against the grain to what most other people of society would do in life, then you are criticized, ridiculed, mocked, and judged for it.

You will notice that friends, family, work colleagues, strangers on social media, and all these many type people have worldly views and opinions. It's the formation of one big set of rules and beliefs that society has influenced us to follow, to which most people agree to, all because so many other people are doing it, including those people closest to them in life. Because most people are so concerned about how others will perceive them and judge them, they dare not step away from this blueprint of life society has constructed. Let's refer back to what I said earlier though, about most people living their life in unhappiness, dissatisfaction, and misery. There's the connection right there. Most people are unhappy, unsatisfied, miserable, and goal starved because they are influenced to follow what the majority of other people are doing. It's at this point, I want to refer to the famous quote by Earl Nightingale that reads “Watch what everyone else does – do the opposite. The majority is always wrong.”, because it is so true, and yet people can't see this. Even if they can see this, they are too afraid to step away from anything that society does, because they don't want to be criticized, mocked, and ridiculed. They are so focused on wanting to be liked and respected by others, that they become completely distracted from achieving what they desire for themselves in life. They believe if people come to like them and respect them, then they want gossip about them, judge them, or talk behind their back, when all along, they do anyway. How is it that so many people are more concerned about being liked than actually being happy? We constantly have people in our ear telling us how we should live, how most other people live, what is socially acceptable, what is abnormal, what decisions we need to make, what actions we need to take, and so on. All the while, very little of this is actually what is in our best interest. We need to have the mental strength to block out the influence of other people, and from being manipulated into living our life in a way others expect and want us to live it! Although certain government laws prevent us from doing certain things, which are unlawful for a reason, we otherwise have a complete freedom to live life however we choose to, and in a way that brings us complete happiness and satisfaction.

The second form of influence is everyday life itself. Off the back of being told to follow the blueprint of life that society has influenced us to follow, next we have society's blueprint of a normal day. Wake up, rush to get ready, battle through peak hour traffic, work 10 hours at a job we hate, battle through peak hour traffic again, arrive home, make dinner, organize the kids, relax in front of the television for a little bit, and get into bed for a whole 6 hours sleep. Oh, and we can't forget to pay the bills and leave ourselves with next to no money in our bank account thereafter, because our job pays us pittance, after all. At least there's the weekend to look forward to, right? We create this routine for ourselves that completely fills up our day, and we question why there's never any time to do anything else for ourselves, and yet a lot of the daily tasks and activities we do are often non-productive or beneficial to us. There are no actions in our daily schedule that focus on creating a life of happiness and satisfaction, nor are centered around achieving our goals. We diminish our health from a lack of sleep, we work long hours at a job that we don't even like, which is only making the company and its executives wealthy from the work we do, rather than ourselves, and we waste so much time doing pointless activities such as watching Netflix or television, or browsing through our social media, yet we still complain that there aren't enough hours in the day. We become so entangled in this everyday life we have created for ourselves, that we completely lose sight of the things that should be most important to us in life, such as our goals, our health, our happiness, and our family. We are too frightened to change this routine up though, because we are comfortable, we feel in control, and we are scared of change. How can we expect to achieve our goals and happiness though, living such a life? We need to make changes, adjust our priorities, commit to the actions that are progressing us towards our goals, and readjust our schedule in line with what aspects of our life are most important to us.

Whether it's the influence of society and people, or the influence and demands of everyday life, we should never allow anyone or anything the right to distract us from achieving the life that we desire, and the goals that we dream of. We need to remain focused on our goals, committed to the decisions and actions that are progressing towards achieving these goals, and be following our heart for what we believe is best for our happiness and our future. Don't be afraid to make changes, or even be fearful about the pursuit of your goals, just go for it! You deserve to be happy, successful, and fulfilled in your life!

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