The Janitor Effect

You wanna' hear something cool? There's a man I work with who has this special ability to show up in places where he's not needed. I don't really know how to describe this mysterious power, but for now we'll just refer to it as getting-on-my-damn-nerves.

I hate to sound like a dee-eye-see-kay, but what will I accomplish beating around a bush? One of my biggest pet peeves is people who are too comfortable inserting themselves, and this guy is not alone in having that habit. We'll be discussing all of that in just a second.

Honestly, I should be grateful to him in a way. Unlike the rest of The Annoying Gang, he somewhat helped to inspire me. If it wasn't for his nosey tendencies, the things you're about to read wouldn't have come to be.

Meet The Irky Bunch

Let's do the introductions in proper order, starting from around 2021. I'm working at a gas station and the manager is being replaced. For those of us who understand job politics, new management potentially means new kinds of people being let in the door.

In this case, one of those people happens to be a lady in her forties hired for "facility maintenance." Simply put, she's the janitor. In order to disguise her true identity, we'll just call her Cathy. We can nickname the whole squad honestly.

Cathy

She always came off as very kind. She happened to be a "special needs" individual with "bipolar disorder" and some other stuff, which she let everyone know as soon as she met them.

Due to her unique situation, she was grateful to have a job and worked very hard. She routinely cleaned bathrooms, took out trash, and did anything management asked——at the beginning.

Sorry to say, but Cathy didn't seem as "special needs" as she claimed to be. After some time, I got to see that she was competitive, sneaky, and extremely nosy. She always insisted on involving herself in the business of cashiers and management.

If she wasn't butting into your transactions with a customer, she was listening to your convos to report to others. When new hires would start the job, she would try bossing them around the whole day——as if she were in charge or something!

That's not even the best part. Despite her nature of always being in the way, there was one particular thing that seemed of little interest to her: CLEANING! Any time she was asked to clean, there was pushback. She would stand there looking irritated or give an excuse for not doing it.

I remember one afternoon when a truck full of landscapers tore through the store during lunchbreak and left clumps of mud everywhere. Mind you, I'm the assistant manager at this time. When I pointed out the mess to Cathy, her reply was one for the books.

"Why should I bother sweeping if it's just gonna' get dirty again?!" she snaps.

I couldn't believe my ears. Babe, welcome to work. If I can't ask the janitor to clean an obvious mess, then who the hell am I supposed to ask? If I have to do it all myself, then what are you even here for? Let's move on to the next before I get mad.

Shabby

Now we're in late 2023 and I'm at a whole new place, in a whole new area. This store is much bigger with lots more happening, which means staff has to communicate via walkie-talkie. Accordingly, any time there's a spill or a mess, the "utility" department can expect to be buzzed. Utility is what they call the people that clean. In other words, they're the janitors.

Amongst this team of janitors is a woman we'll call Shabby. For starters, Shabby introduced herself when I was working in the Dairy department. It was a one-man responsibility that didn't require any sanitation equipment, yet she still somehow saw it fit to participate. (Yay!)

Oddly enough, she assumed I needed her instruction. I made it overly clear that I didn't need help, yet this woman insisted on trying to direct me. She emphasized a lot that she'd worked the department before (amongst many other departments over time).

Ma'am, respectfully, I didn't ask.

Speaking of which, I learned very quickly that she wasn't the person to "ask" for anything. One of my first accidents on the job was a busted gallon of tea in the cooler. Shabby happened to be the utility person on duty. When I brought the mess to her attention, she replied, "We don't clean up in coolers" and left the matter alone. How convenient.

Well at least she was nice enough to tell me how to clean it...SIKE! This was merely another method of escape. I started to notice that no matter what the situation was, she somehow was giving me pointers for doing it myself instead of just getting on her damn job.

The final straw for me was a night when a customer dropped a 12-pack box of beer bottles and left the case leaking. I told Shabby that I would (generously) get up the glass while she mopped, as long as I had something to help transport the debris.

Frustrated to be summoned, Shabby finds a box and chunks it at my feet while my hands are waiting to grab it. It's like the disrespect was getting bolder! (For the record, Shabby is NOT a "special needs" adult.)

I was officially over this woman. I was over this janitor. I fully accepted that she didn't want to be asked to clean. As eager as she was to be in other places, giving orders to coworkers, there was always a malfunction when it was time to do what she signed up for. She'll leave spilled milk and broken jars laying on the floor until close if you let her. Is this starting to sound familiar?

Jackie

Now Jackie is the nickname for the man we spoke about earlier. He's not like the others when it comes to cleaning, but he's damn near identical when it comes to getting beside his role.

His favorite hobby, like Shabby, is coming to help me with things I don't need help with. The only difference is that he will try to take your task completely over; He'll hijack your shit.

God forbid I make even an itty bitty misstep in something I'm trying to do, Jackie will see it as an opening to jump in and rob the glory. For years now, I've had to evade this man who pounces for a chance to correct me.

So then comes June 9, 2026...

I was tasked with removing hundreds of cases of sparkling water from an aisle and transferring them to a pallet to be stored in the back. The pallet was tall and heavy as hell, yet still had to be moved to a backroom with very little space. This job was a challenge, but nothing too intimidating for me.

When I get to the back, I create an opening juuust big enough to squeeze this gigantic mass of bubbly drinks. The space was literally just tall enough and just wide enough to fit this boulder, so my movements would have to be PRECISE. Luckily for me, I've been using pallet jacks since my junior year, so I know what I'm doing. I got this.

As I maneuver my object with slow and steady focus, I hear a heckle.

"That ain't gon fit!" "That ain't enough room!"

Lo and behold, it's Jackie; Hollering like a Bloodhound who'd just learned English. It's no surprise to see him lurking in the shadows. I should have known he would stop to observe my assignment. Despite my efforts to dismiss him, he creeps closer with readiness to adjust what I'd put in place.

"Jackie, I got it! I wanna' handle this myself!" I protest.

Like a respectful man, Jackie somewhat backs off. I saw him move away, but for some reason, I can still feel his presence. Surely enough, this intruding man spawns in the corner of my eye, still monitoring me like a scarecrow with a name badge.

I looked him right in his face. "BYE?!" I snapped.

Finally, he removed himself. As serious as I was about being left alone, I have to admit I felt a little bit like a dickhead. I hate to be ugly, but it's always the same old thing with these people. They'll step on my toes while I do my work, but put up a fight when it comes to their own.

Opting to be compassionate, I said to myself, "They just want to be included", "They want to show their value", "Perhaps I should be more patient." However, when I recalled the lashings from their bitter attitudes, something told me not to waste my precious sympathy so quickly. After the voice of reason insisted I be a bit nicer, another voice jumped readily behind it.

"Should I though?" I thought. "After all, he chose his role."

Something about that sentiment seemed to turn on a light bulb in my head. Just as soon as it left my lips, I was pulling out my phone to make a profound note. In real time, I had highlighted the drawback of choosing easy paths. It's all fun and games to avoid challenges and responsibilities until you end up at the bottom of the food chain, feeling left out of the conversation. I now call this phenomenon "The Janitor Effect."

Although I recognize that life can be unpredictable, I'm also certain that members of custodial personnel have often abandoned other positions; They INTEND to spend their days coasting. I'd say this is a perfect analogy for most others who struggle to focus on their own circumstances in life. To be frank, I actually DON'T owe any of these janitors a great deal of compassion.

No matter what the angel on my shoulder is telling me, I know intuitively that the burdens of EGO and COMPARISON are what make it difficult for people to simply stay in their lane. If the topic of this tale wasn't so broad, I'd dare to say there's something about me specifically, a high performer, that makes people unhappy with their own duties, ready and willing to overstep.

Even now that I'm working in a kitchen, I've encountered some of the same issues. One of my current biggest pains as a cook is the handful of servers that are itching to come and do my job. They touch your tools, they touch your grill, and they're very nosy about your methods. Many of them brag about having been in my shoes before, but they fail to acknowledge that they've stepped AWAY from the role.

Focus on your own shit!

This is a case of The Janitor Effect in the food biz. The longstanding servers like to say the money isn't good enough for cooks, but I know deep down that they couldn't even handle the pressure. Some constantly try to belittle my job as if to PROJECT onto me a feeling of being in the wrong position. (Which is not what confident people do.)

In pursuit of less demanding work, these simpletons stuck to wiping tables and pouring teas, but can't seem to sit comfortably when they see me in my zone; Gracefully executing the very thing that really keeps a kitchen running.

So thank you, Jackie

You can't have your cake and eat it too! Respect and visibility is gained by those who have VALUE, and such value is not gained doing as little as possible. Such value is not gained by avoiding the hard stuff or being a quitter. It is gained through discipline and willingness to be challenged.

Even the simplest people in your daily life have a way of reminding you the bigger picture. The bottom line is that you gotta' pursue what's most rewarding. Keep your eyes on the prize, set yourself up to win, and don't back out. Otherwise, you'll be at the end of the road upset with the world about YOUR choices.

When the time comes for you to be in the same rooms with the people you deem outstanding, will you be on common ground? Or will you simply be a "common" man, sweeping their tater tots OFF the ground? That is what your choices will determine every single day.