The Bonsai Approach to Managing Your Life

Little bonsai trees can show us how to manage our lives. We can buy them. We can fake them. We can make them. Often, living ones have been pruned and shaped for centuries.

"Bonsai" (盆栽, literally 'tray planting') is a Japanese version of the original traditional Chinese art called penzai. Similar practices are found in other Asian cultures. But what can we learn from an ancient tree art to deal with the silicon speed and cement hardness of modern life? How can a simple bonsai tree bought at a big box home decor store help us thrive in our busy world, very far indeed from the Shogunates and stabilizing behaviour codes of Japan?

However you come across the idea of bonsai, it can shape you in a way that allows you to weather storms, find nourishment, grow stronger, shed what is no longer useful and fit well within whatever container you are in, whether school, work, relationships, parenthood and more.

In it's purest form, bonsai is simply the mindful, patient art and practice of shaping, pruning and caring for a seedling of a full size tree in a way that allows it to remain small, developing tough roots in a tray while bringing to mind and representing much larger versions of itself found in nature.

Little bonsai trees can show us how to manage our lives. Solutions are often found in the last places we look. Some of the best things come in small packages. Trees are elemental, strangely eternal. Most of the trees we see will still be here long after we are gone. And that’s okay. They represent life and stability. Community and continuity.

However you come across the idea of bonsai trees, they can shape you in ways that allow you to weather storms, find nourishment, grow stronger, shed what is no longer useful. You can fit well again within whatever of life's containers you find yourself in these days. Whether you are in school, at a new job, hating a stale job, in a relationship, out of a relationship, as a new parent, experiencing loss of a loved one… And so much more. What shape would you like for yourself?

Let's practice some mental bonsai.

Find a quiet spot where you can breathe freely and focus on an idea, without many distractions. A quiet nook in a comfortable chair. A favourite park bench. In your car, parked on the side of a quiet country road. A nice, warm bubble bath? It does not matter where you choose. Just pick a spot that makes you feel calm where you can begin to use your imagination.

Ready?

Close your eyes. Take a few deep breathes, exhaling for a bit longer than you inhale each time. Feel your body relax. Enjoy the space. Breathe easy. Let your mind wander a bit.

Now, think of a big problem that has been growing in your mind for some time. It may pop up on its own from beneath your calm mind. Did something arise? Great. If not, just pick a problem you are ready to do something about. But keep bonsai in mind. The idea is not to think of large, world-sized problems. It is easy to pick these since everyone - believe it or not - is concerned about them, at some point. The environment. Income equality. Politics. Terrorism. Changing societal norms. But these – as important as they may be – are not something you can manage by yourself. Focussing on these larger problems is like looking into a dark, deep forest. Instead, focus on one problem, not a set of problems. And not on other people's problems. Find your problem. Pick your tree out of that dark, frightening, impassable forest. Maybe it is something as simple as getting started on taxes. Cleaning a closet... Maybe it's a bigger problem. But it's manageable, bit by bit.

Can you see it?

Do you see the problem or issue or pain that has been bothering you that you want to make smaller? Can you rotate the problem in your mind like your mental bonsai tree? Can you see it from different angles? Can you tip it upside down?! Can you climb it and get into the branches? Take your time. Spend some time with it. Define it. Name it. Make it something you can deal with. Break it in to pieces, bit by bit. Chop off some of the rough, dead-looking wood. Spend some time noticing that which is still good, the parts of the problem that still made sense to you. What do you want to keep of your problem? How deep are the roots in you, really? What are the first things – small things – that you can do to make the problem more manageable?

It is okay to carry your problem around for a while. It is equally okay to set it down and take a rest. It will still be there, right? But the real important part of this mental bonsai is making problems smaller over time. Pruning the old thoughts, the outdated emotions, the rotten memories. Re-shaping the problem to make it work for you, rather than against you. Using your skills and imagination to create something tough and beautiful. Something that, after all, reflects the best from inside you.

Maybe the best way to take your problems, one by one, is to think of them as big, old trees. Then find a seedling. Take it home. Plant it, but not too deep. As you shape it the way you want, think of your problem…

Make something better.