Restriction

At some point or another in time, everyone is bound to feel limited. This can range anywhere from feeling like you can't achieve your goals, to not being able to go where you want. What can we do to change the feelings of limitedness and to what end?

Some escape into video games, where you can choose your own destiny or shape your own world, picking choices that help you create and fulfill temporary short-term goals. As you advance through each level or goal—or with some games like Grand Theft Auto, where there is no set goal—you are only able to play through them like a simulation, like The Sims.

Others turn to substance in order to escape their reality, so they can create their own worlds. I sought my escape last year and since then, I cut myself off from the outer world. Becoming a recluse, focusing on creating and perfecting my own world. Everything that I have created and done to better, impress, and to solidify this perfect world of mine.

After creating and solidifying said world, the only thing left was to better myself. With each swing of my training knife being more deadly than the last. Perfecting my footwork, each drop of the shoulder, swing of the hip, perfecting and preparing, shaping and shifting myself into the ultimate assassin. As true hitmen know, once you're good enough, your targets will come to you.

The techniques have different layers; there's the outer layer and the inner. The outer is relatively straightforward, focusing on your footwork, strikes, stances; the physical portion of the art form. The inner is more psychological, focusing on toying with your target's mind, throwing them off balance, and distracting; any methods that cause them to reveal flaws in their own strategy.

Knowledge about your target is essential. Reconnaissance is necessary and the more details you have, the more you can toy with them. Doing so can throw them off and open their defenses so you can strike when they are vulnerable. It's the true assassin nature. Being able to know the ins and outs of your target. Being able to take them down at any given moment.

Feelings of restrictiveness cause us to lash out and force us to channel our aggression into other things such as martial arts, video games, dancing, or other artistic-like outlets. We feel restricted by ourselves unable to achieve our goals, or by others standing in the way of us achieving them. We continue to focus and fixate channeling our feelings into things that we feel less restricted at, so we have the chance to feel like a living god.

This cycle continues indefinitely until we either achieve our goals or simply give up, which ever comes first. Once we give up, we can feel our minds collapsing into darkness, and us being swallowed up by the void. Once in, darkness consumes and blinds. We lash and embrace darkness and then we truly have nothing to gain or lose, thus becoming the most dangerous person in any room at any given time. Capable of snapping at any moment.

Embracing this darker self is scary at first, as you will come to find that you have discovered new abilities that you either didn't know about or recently gained. When you look past the abilities and reach deep within, you feel... different. You explore parts of yourself that are new and undiscovered. Exploring and venturing deep within, causing yourself to become isolated. Once you get past the loneliness and the dark, you are only left with the truest, darkest version of yourself that in itself is the true terror when you become unrecognizable to yourself...

Once you become a different person, things are never the same. You start to discover new hobbies, new ideas, a new identity entirely, until it finally takes hold. This identity is the strongest. It strikes down the weak. It kills all other lesser versions of it until it is without a doubt that it is the only identity left. All previous selfs are dead.

Falling past the fear, the doubt, and the change, you find yourself new. You're a new person, you have more abilities than you ever could have possibly imagined before. You feel like a god. Reveling in your old self's old shadow becomes inevitable—due to the fact that you're constantly shifting and shaping this identity, whether you know it or not.

Running, shifting, shaping, and escaping are the only methods to free yourself from feeling limited. Any other tactic either doesn't improve your feeling of confinement or is pointless so you learn how to escape into things to avoid the harshness of your reality.