My Ups and Downs with Self Love

It's safe to say that struggling with self love is something that all of us have dealt with at one point or another. Self love is a continuous journey that needs to be worked on at all times. A few years ago, I was in a place where I loved everything about myself, I loved everything about my life and my friends. I thought I was golden and nothing could stop me. Then all of a sudden, when I stopped working on my self love every day it all came crumbling down and I am still working my way up that battle to where I was before. As much as it is a let down, mainly because I can see a huge difference in my life and the way I walk through my day to day activities, I hope that I will come out stronger than I was before because I now know what both sides feel like: self hate and self love.

So now the big question, how do you fall back in love with yourself after you’ve fallen out of love with yourself? Here are some things you can do, to get back on the right track to treating yourself like a queen and loving everything for that you are. Trust me, it is a work in progress and some things are easier said than done, shit do I know that. But it is a process and all you can do is try.

1. Reread your favourite book!

This can bring back some old memories and happiness, and it can even remind you of little things about yourself that you have forgotten along the way.

2. Go OUT to dinner ALONE!

I know you've been eyeing that new restaurant near your fave coffee shop, so take the leap and try it out. You don't need to be with someone in order to enjoy something. This is a great way to learn to enjoy your own company.

3. Masturbate!

Make yourself happy. How is someone supposed to love you like that if you can't try to love yourself like that? It also helps you learn what you like which can translate to better sex with someone else.

4. Do something spontaneous!

Get that tattoo, piercing, or haircut you've been thinking about. Taking care of yourself by doing things you want to do is one way to learn to re-love parts of you that have slipped away.

5. Meal Prep!

You don't have to plan every single meal and every single snack for every single day of the week. It is A LOT of work, I know because I've tried it many times. Start small. Plan out lunch every day for a week. Then the following week plan out your breakfast and lunch. Taking the extra time to care for what goes into your body will help you realize that you are important and should value your eating habits because they can make or break how you feel a certain day.

6. Do something nice for someone else!

This could be anything from buying feminine hygiene products for a homeless person to volunteering at a soup kitchen or fundraising for your school's charity at the time. Doing something nice for someone else can make you realize you are a nice person who is appreciated and is worthy of your own love.

7. Bake your favourite dessert!

Reward yourself for something, whether it is not failing your last midterm, or not getting fired from your job, or showering today. Try baking some cookies instead of buying that tub of ice-cream and eating it in one sitting. You can have fun and dance in the kitchen while having a nice treat that you worked for.

​ 8. Start a 365 Positive Day Jar!

Write down something good about yourself every day and put it into a jar. When you are having an off day take a few of these out and read them to boost your mood. You can also read all of your notes at the end of each month which can be rewarding to look back and have something to visualize other than your IG posts.

9. Create Affirmations!

Telling yourself positive things about yourself in the morning can set up your whole day for success and self love.

10. Call your Parent!

When in doubt, calling this person whether it's your mom or dad or aunt, can go on and on about how wonderful you are. It does not hurt to give my mom a call so she can praise me. On top of that, you can also ask your parent to share an old photo of you on Facebook so you can watch all of her friends praise you too.

Falling in love with yourself is a difficult task, especially in our society, but falling BACK in love with yourself after you've lost your way can be just as difficult if not more so. I hope that some of these tips help you to navigate your way back to loving yourself. BECAUSE WE ALL DESERVE LOVE, especially from ourselves.