Moving Soul and Dreaming Feet: The Accidental Story of a Girl Who Connected Her Passion with Academics

I YELLED about it,

I INHALED you in,

I LIVED without it,

Where you STOP is the place where I BEGIN.

Looking back, I realize my journey, like all of ours, is indebted to certain beautiful people who stood strong by us, unconditionally. For me, it starts with Mrs. Anand, my high school psychology teacher. Whenever I think of her, a sudden wave of motivation passes through my mind and body, as she was the person who first gave me the gift of trust, in myself.

Delhi as a place gave me numerous lessons. My early years were filled with obstacles, from family and friends, as most of them were doubtful about my career option. Still, these obstacles were treated as lessons and my passion instructed me to carry ahead despite against all odds. I was somehow determined that I should attempt and learn.

The next phase of my life journey begins with my college dance group where I used to cry, giggle, bounce, interface, feel broken, get shattered, be gloomy, go cheerful, feel awesome, pitiful, hopeless, far-fetched, miserable and a great deal more. I confronted my parents' lot many times to make them comprehend dance; however, for them, it was just an exercise in futility and "a thing that is letting you far from your studies." Being a daughter of a former Indian decathlete and an Arjuna award winner (1981), and knowing my father’s legacy, could be troubling at times, though I admire his achievements. What I mean is all these facts made me seriously think about where I am heading to with my career plans. I started feeling like being a slave after my graduation, as I could not dance due to family pressure regarding my profession ahead. I got myself enrolled for masters in clinical psychology and arranged things in advance to retain my dancing energy. I was a bit discouraged with the environment around me and had to leave dancing because of my studies. Still on and off, I continued doing what my heart wanted to do and was looking for motivation here and there. Then one day, I got to know about something called "Dance Movement Therapy (DMT)" through social media and it was an end of many things and quite an exciting beginning.

What I had so far known about movement was dance, dance, and dance. But movement therapy made me look beyond the stereotype. Movement to me was always moving without thinking and expressing my feelings, not caring about techniques or thinking about the way I look while moving. This gave me a sudden flashback of a dance class where I was unable to do a proper technique in the contemporary routine and how my instructor insulted me in front of everyone. That memory gave me an experience of worthlessness, hopelessness and disconnected me from my body. I started attending creative movement therapy workshops and gleefully found out the connection between movement, creativity and therapy. This gave me an insight of dance therapy and therapeutic dance.

Therefore, it was natural that my master’s thesis topic would celebrate this happy convergence of my passion for movement and my academic interest in therapy. If seeing children learning things through dance therapy was the emotional reward of the research, the academic reward was waiting. After the completion of my thesis work, my mentor, Prof. (Dr) Anuradha Sharma of Amity University, Noida, sent my research paper to the International Journal of Indian Psychology (IJIP) and it got selected. I was deeply pleased that my teacher, mentor, and guide considered my work important enough to be sent to an international journal. It was a small piece of paradise for me when I got an email confirming the publication of my thesis: "Dance Therapy as a Treatment Modality for Autistic Children in Social Interaction." It was published in Volume 2, Issue 3, No.5, in the International Journal of Indian Psychology.

More things were bound to happen on this journey. It is the path that chooses us. In my quest for learning more on creative movement and its application in therapeutic contexts, I came across India's pioneer in the field: Tripura Kashyap, the co-founder of Creative Movement Therapy Association of India (CMTAI). It was at a creative movement therapy workshop we met. She was very impressive and her website told me more about the creative movement therapy course CMTAI offered. I got myself enrolled in the course, the classes made me feel great about my body, my work and myself. The basic yet complicated lesson I learned from these creative therapy classes was being authentic with myself. All we need is pure, mirror-like consciousness, so that whatever life is, reflected there.

After the course, the most awaited annual conference of "Creative Movement Therapy Association of India" happened in November 2015. It really added to the complete twist in my life where I was just being myself and I became more expressive by sharing my thoughts, feelings, views, and understandings. I attended drama and dance therapy workshops during the conference and that was enough to boost my confidence in this field. The workshop gave me a sense of self-understanding and the concept of being naked with thoughts. It brought a lot of motivation, confidence, self-awareness, openness, freedom and eventually guided me towards speaking up approach. Earlier all these were just heavy words for me, often sounding empty and bogus, but now they have a deep personal meaning attached to each.

I believe that everything in this world has a deep meaning. Each person you meet leaves you with experiences and lessons. Nothing is stated as good or bad, but different and this difference makes us what we are today. My personal process made me realize that it is all about the interconnection between our body and our mind, so the change in one impacts the other. This process is endless, symbolic, and can represent unconscious material.

One wish I have for my future creative movement therapy practice is to evolve and enhance my growth in a holistic manner. I am glad that I entered into creative movement therapy field and I hope to be working on different modalities to expand my knowledge in this field.