The ‘higher ups’ at your job who refuse to consult the front-line staff; enacting policies that don’t work, yet expect cooperation to implement.
The uncle that touched your cousin and now won’t stop staring you up and down.
Not to mention the corporations providing essential services but charging exorbitant amounts as they rake in billions a year while you crunch the numbers to make the groceries stretch just one more week.
I get it.
Yes, all of them.
Shall I go on?
The attorney who you paid hellur retainer for but has only delivered meh results.
The neighbours who continue to play loud music late at night during the week when you're trying to get the baby to sleep.
Oh, and let's not forget the doctor who listened to less than a minute of your concerns and dismissed them without a second thought or explanation, leaving you with a prescription for pain relief and the irrepressible urge to eff him off!
The list would be easily longer than my arm if we kept going, but let’s not.
Because I get it. And I get you.
Fact: Staying and rehashing this level of existence does nothing for you and your acquisition of peace and power.
I will not tell you to be the bigger person.
Refuse to advocate for an ass whuppin’ despite the resonant synchronicity appropriate for assholes.
I do, however, feel it imperative that you take control to regain your powerful presence and extend when available, appropriate literal and figurative distance from such archetypes. It’s not about disregarding what people do. It’s about focusing on your own command prompt. It’s about what you do next.
When you slow down the reaction time and accelerate the intention time, amazing things happen. You can do what was never anticipated with authenticity and intensity which effects positive change in spite of those dreaded members of the ‘A’ committee.
Because in the grand scheme of things, do you really want to spend another minute of your precious day dwelling on the membership?
I’ve paid my dues of working in customer service and seeing some of the rudest, most uncooperative idiots the other side of the counter. Senior members of the ‘A’ committee! But someone once offered me a sage perspective:
You only have to deal with them for a little while, they have to live with themselves every day. Day in and day out, 24/7, 365 days of the year.
So here are some important points to remember when deep in the trenches:
1. Take anger/frustration/irritation etc. and turn it around ASAP!
Having the first of the Laws of Motion in mind, it is vital to adjust thoughts, feelings etc. concerning aforementioned members as quickly as is feasible so that a positive trajectory (i.e. the things YOU want) is engaged. Have a moment if you must; it is totally understandable. Call them out for the prima facie idiot(s) that they are hell bent on being (silently in your head) ___just don't stay there! Take any thought steps that take you outta territory such as: -
In a couple of hours, I'll be lounging, spread-eagled in *insert favourite place here* with a cool drink in my hand, chilled and relaxed AF.
I acknowledge my pissed off-edness and recognise that I'm actually angry with myself for allowing this person to waste my precious time/energy/resources etc., so I am remembering to love myself exclusively and exponentially RN.
Understanding that such extreme levels of stupidity are disharmonious with successful societal living, I just need to live right long enough and let karma deliver and leave well enough alone SMH.
In applied theory, for instance, I can remember that some higher ups are cerebral anal-retentives that can't problem-solve past a hill of beans, and my job remit and salary are not inclusive of my anxiety and breathlessness.
2. It's all about the prep___'bout tha prep!
When you know that interaction is unavoidable PREPARE! Ofttimes the best defence really is a good offence.
Have a strategy or two to engage before tensions rise. Do something completely unexpected (and legal). Request a signature for a petition, or donation for a charity fundraiser. Tell a funny joke within earshot (emphasis: funny). Leave travel magazines on the staff coffee table and start conversations about a journey to faraway places.
The key lies in innovation and the unexpected; to throw off the usual dynamic and allow some wiggle room to use to your advantage creating a different atmosphere. So you could for instance, tell the neighbours that you have a free download of their favourite music that you received while looking for "soothe-your-baby-to-sleep" music online and you'd like to give it to bona fide artists like themselves, rather than a high-pitched screaming and complaining exchange.
It's different. And different gets noticed; giving you an 'opening' while people take a moment to process. Contrived, fake or pretence cannot be a part of this equation. Whatever you decide to do, be sure that it is genuine.
3. Write stuff down.
Many people want to hold on to their 'A' membership indefinitely, so with that in mind, record events accurately that occur (date, time, place etc.) and keep documenting.
If you have witnesses that will support you___great, but do not feel that if you have no one to give an impartial account of an event, that all is lost. Should there be a time that you face opposition, get pulled on the carpet over something, or wish to pursue a formal complaint in whatever form, you will have a good evidence timeline. Chances are for longstanding committee members, there will be incidents with others over time, thus an established track record. You may have unseen leverage.
So, write down in detail the realities of the front line when service users are not pleased with service provision and become non-compliant as a result. Senior administrators in this instance, who refuse written evidence and feedback from staff when enacting policy will negatively impact resources and future resource allocation, and few organisations will condone continued waste. Document with integrity and keep documenting.
4. Know your acronyms.
Policy and procedure (PNP). Not Safe For Work (NSFW). The United Auto Workers Union (UAW). The Office of gas and electricity markets (Ofgem). There are countless others. There are acronyms that command attention.
Remember that everyone has policies and statutory requirements that they are governed by. Remember that everyone in the public and private sector has someone to answer to. Remember that you are entitled to support, and that accessing it from someone with more expertise in a specific arena is a shot well played. So, if for example, you are dealing with a doctor that is not engaging you in compliance with standards of medical professionalism, can you say GMC (General Medical Council)?
5. Go A.I. on 'em.
Amnesty International has a time-tested winning strategy for addressing injustice all over the world, so take a page out of their play book and expose unfavourable incidents. Kinda like the same feeling felt when you 'mouthed-off' to your Mama, but then she shut you up by embarrassing you in front of all your friends.
This of course is an end action strategy for when all others have been unsuccessful, or if the situation is of sufficient gravity___like that creepy uncle! Scream holy eternal fire!
Perpetrators don't necessarily enjoy an audience to their behaviours, so shine the biggest spotlight you can. You may not have the resources to do world stage level, but you can highlight your plight within your local community, detailing how little that BIG corporation is doing to assist struggling, hard-working families like yourselves. Corporations don't like bad press, so keep the core issues front and center in concise language.
I totally understand if you are not one for making a scene or are the quiet type and require this strategy. Do understand that loudmouth committee members are also a factor in our societies and recruit members accordingly. But I'm sure just about everyone knows that one friend who has the gift...who knew that it would come in handy?
While dealing with members of the 'A' Committee can really suck, it is a scenario that can be negotiated to your advantage. Interventions have resulted in closer scrutiny and improved environments. Demonstrating restraint can gain you allies and alert you to cause(s) that you are passionate about. You can undoubtedly grow from the experience and always have another resume builder; that you are not, nor are actively seeking committee membership.