Let's Pretend

There are a lot of people that are sad. And when they are sad, they don't know what to do. Maybe for some people, it is clear. But I know, for the most part, it isn't. So maybe next time you're sad, you can do some of these things or think about them. Now, these aren't things to make you feel better, they are just the typical ways people go to when they are sad.

When you are sad, you might cry. You might start crying the minute you feel down, or you let it really sink in. I prefer to make sure to let it sink in before crying, you generally allow yourself to have a small pep talk on if it was appropriate to cry in that situation or moment. And when you are crying, it seems easier to gasp in difficult patterns. Make sure to breathe. Holding it in makes you feel like crying longer than you would want.

When you are sad, you might go somewhere. Could be driving, walking, running. Maybe going to a coffee shop, the store, an empty park, or just stay at home and isolate yourself.

When you're sad, you might drink or smoke. That's where most people turn to nowadays. Have a shot of vodka, glass of wine. Go outside and smoke a cigarette or two. Smoke weed to forget for a moment. Whatever other drugs someone might do to release.

When you're sad, you either isolate yourself immediately, or you stick around to fight. You tell the person that caused your sadness to go f*** themselves. Because you feel like nothing to them. You feel like that wasted space that nobody wants around. You feel like even though you try your absolute hardest and just try to do things right, it is never right in their eyes. You recognize that they made a promise to take care of you and they kept it. But somewhere down the road, you got lost. Somewhere along the way, something happened and you can' figure out what. They don't act the same or talk the same. They think you don't appreciate them but they just don't know how much you do. You try to show them in the smallest ways and maybe sometimes you are brave enough to go big. You try and you try. You want to ask questions but you know they might laugh. They might throw it away before it even fully comes out. You are scared. You wish you knew all the things that are wrong. You want to know how to fix it, how you can change yourself. And, that is what is wrong with us.

When you are sad, you stay up all night because that's the only true time that nobody knows who you are. You contemplate things. Come up with plans you won't follow through with. And you might cry more.

When you are sad, you point out everything that is wrong with you. You say "I hate you" and wish you were different in many ways.

When you are sad, you start distancing yourself from people. You do that because you know those are the ones that will judge you for feeling the way you feel. They'll look at you and think that you don't appreciate anything. A complainer. They might throw stuff at you, that you have nothing to do with.

When you are sad, you might go on the internet and read poetry, or watch videos or listen to music. The music you choose will only make you sadder. You might write or type.

When you are sad, you never want to stop being sad.