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It's Time To Love Yourself

by Oberon Von Phillipsdorf 9 months ago in self help

3 tips how to practise self-love even on your worst days.

I’ve had a tough day. I’ve had many bad days. I’ve felt unworthy and just not good enough to carry on throughout the day.

Work was hectic, and all of my efforts somehow feel unappreciated. I’ve argued with my siblings and I feel unheard. I’ve spent time and time beating myself up just because — I’ve had a bad day.

Sounds familiar?

All of us have bad days. Days that are filled with challenges and can leave us feeling undeserving of self-love, which is why it’s important on those days to practice self-love intentionally.

I used to believe that I can’t love myself until I do or finish this or that. We expect others to love us unconditionally, but then we condition ourselves.

Learning to love yourself unconditionally is an entirely different thing. Loving yourself unconditionally is realizing you’re having a bad day and accepting it while knowing it doesn’t take away your worth in any way whatsoever.

You will have many more bad days. You will get sad. You’re human. It’s okay.

It’s important to learn how to treat yourself with care, even when you feel like you don’t deserve it. I have perfected overturning bad days into good days. As every day being on this Earth — is a good day.

Below are my 3 tips that always work for me.

1. Treat Yourself Like You Would Treat Your Partner

If your partner came to you and confided that he is having a bad day at work — would you tell him that he is a failure and would surely get fired? I hope not.

Well, then instead of overthinking and being negative, try to imagine that all the bad things that have been bothering you — have happened to someone you are close to. What would you tell your close friend to help them snap out of negativity?

You will stand up for them. You would defend them and you would comfort them. In no time you will realize that you are finally defending yourself and you will feel instantly better.

If you are a parent, then you will be familiar with your child saying “I can’t do this” or “ I am not good enough at this”. Do you agree with your child or do you tend to motivate them that they are good enough — no, that they are more than enough!

This trick helps me every single time.

2. Make A First Aid Routine

I have come up with a bad day routine for those days when I feel mentally drained and I am re-charging My bad day routine serves as an emergency response to any negative thoughts.

It involves turning my phone off, making a bubble bath, putting on soothing music, reading Chekhov, and having a good meal. My partner knows of my bad day routine, and he is aware that those are the days when he is cooking for me — which I like to misuse sometimes.

Your routine doesn’t have to include baths and Chekhov but find something that helps you relieve your mind a bit. There are so many ways to love yourself, and making a special routine can be a good way to give yourself a boost.

Try indulging in your favorite dessert, watching your favorite movie, going for a walk, meditating, or anything else that brings you peace. Not every day is going to be a day that you feel on your top, so you must take care of yourself so that you can always bounce back.

Not only does this allow you to be kinder towards yourself when you’re going through a difficult time, but it might help you learn and grow and move forward in positive ways.

Often, when we feel like we don’t deserve self-love is when we need it the most.

3. Take a break — Really

When I feel overwhelmed and know that I am not in my best shape to make a business decision, I stopped pressuring myself to “take” that decision and just pull through. I take a break.

I don’t let the thoughts take control of myself. I distract myself and escape — which eventually leads me to make the best of decisions.

Next time — you feel like the world is falling on your shoulders and you are unable to breathe. Take a step back. Step out of that world and do things that make you feel better.

It isn’t repression. It’s redirecting your attention. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you — they are working against you.

It’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later.

Sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

It’s important to realize that you are important and worthy of love from yourself and others at all times, not just when good things happen in your life. You’re just as needed on this earth as anyone else, and you’re just as deserving of your time here.

On good days and on the bad days — you matter.

Be patient with yourself. Accept that loving yourself is a lifelong process, and you have to practice patience. Take pride in the progress you have made and keep fighting for yourself.

I promise You are worth it.

self help

Oberon Von Phillipsdorf

A writer.

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Oberon Von Phillipsdorf
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