It Is Your Job To Get Happy
Evolving is a personal experience.
Hello everyone and good morning on #BellLetsTalk Day 2020; one of my favourite days of the year for so many reasons. Last year, I wrote my very first published article, 5 Key Self-Care Tips for Beginners on Vocal. I remember how overwhelmed I was by the positive response and I'm still forever thankful for all the support I have gotten on my articles.
#BellLetsTalk Day is a day that can bring up suppressed feelings relating to mental health and it isn't an easy day for some. On the other hand, many people take this day as a day to celebrate their successes and growth of their mental health. It's all a perspective and how you choose to feel today is totally up to you.
I just re-read my first article for the first time since I posted it. I typically refrain from re-reading my previous work because I get a cringe feeling when I look at my past work. It's the same feeling that you get when you watch yourself on an old video and you think to yourself, 'my voice is so ugly' or 'I look so horrible there, what was I thinking?'.
I was astonished by the growth in my writing and in my mental health. Reflecting back to that time in my life, I wasn't being honest with myself. I remember writing that article to impress others and to show others that coping is achievable. I was letting the world perceive me as a person who was doing the best thing for herself when in reality, I was a mess.
On #BellLetsTalk Day, one of the major topics relating to mental health is the effect of social media and the perception of others. I truly believe that this a bigger issue than most people see and something that most of us don't even realize we do. As I said before, the article wasn't for me, it was so that others could see me as someone who had it all together. It wasn't until months later, in June where I had a slap in the face of sanity. This is when I finally realized that I was lying to myself all this time. I was blaming others for my negative mental health and not owning up to my own mistakes. In the article, I gave beginners tips on how to start feeling better mentally and physically. While all the tips I gave were true and helpful, I was not doing them myself; a liar.
After I hit that realization of blaming others for my mishaps, I started making changes in my life to not blame others for my sadness. I finally started to understand that very famous RuPaul quote, "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love someone else?". I started doing things that were for myself and not JUST for others; doing things that made me feel good. After reading that sentence, you might think that I was selfish and only cared about myself, that is very wrong. I obviously would take care of the people that I cared about and this made me feel good. Helping our friends it their time of need is a win win situation in my books. Not only does the friend feel better but that rewarding feeling of helping is unbeatable.
Being happy is not that difficult. Depression and other forms of mental illness can be covered up by pretending to be happy, but genuine happiness is a whole new level of healing. Genuine happiness is when you don't have to put on a brave face and impersonate what a happy person should look like. This idea might seem impossible to those who suffer with mental illness, but genuine happiness is achievable for everyone. I'm not saying that once you find your genuine happiness that you'll be cured, it doesn't work like that. I'm saying that every person has something they love and if each person, even someone with mental illness, strived for what makes them happy, this world would be a lot nicer.
Trust me, I'm human and my mood can be effected by others actions. In reality though, life is way too short to not be happy and to have others sway how we feel. Know yourself, tune into what your body is telling you to do and do it.
Our mood is one of the small things about ourself that we can control, so why not control your mood for the better.
Relating back to mental health, I also understand that happiness is difficult for some. One of my friends who suffers from depression once told me, "Sometimes, I can't choose happiness but I at least know what to do so that I can get through the day". That quote truly is the definition of 'keeping it real'. Maybe if choosing to be happy is too much of a struggle, at least know what makes you get through the day.
Each person is different but each person is capable of getting through a rough patch.
5 Key Self-Care Tips for Beginners was a great article for where I was mentally when I wrote it. The writing was basic and not as harsh and deep like this one is. I have learned to live my life with genuine happiness and I'm able to acknowledge my feelings and control when needed. My mental health grew and so did my writing.
Bottomline, it is your job to get happy. Depending on others for your happiness is not genuine happiness. Mental health is a serious topic and something that is needed to be talked about in a relatable way. Sometimes it's easier to sit in bed all day and stare at the ceiling, and if that is what makes you happy, then I rest my case. But look at that from another angle, it's also easy to sing a song, dance, smile and to live a life that you feel genuinely happy with.
We can choose to be happy but we need to do it on our own first.
On this #BellLetsTalk Day 2020, take the time to reflect on your mental health; a quick check in with yourself. Are you evolving on your own or are you waiting for that someone to come around to make you happy? Why wait for that someone when that someone can be you? Get the help you need, do the things that make you feel good and live life truthfully.
Better days are on the horizon.
Happy #BellLetsTalk Day.