How to Become Our Own Most Powerful Person

Fake it till you make it has always been my motto, and to an extent it’s true. As someone who grew up in poverty, I learned to never let others see me as a weak force. And therefore, I didn’t.

I walked into the food bank with a cheerful attitude. And I walked out with a sincere thank you, and my head held high because hey…life happens. And I was not ashamed to be there. No way.

This was my power at that time.

My mother always told me, just because you need to stand in the social assistance line, doesn’t mean you have to look that way. She raised us on her own, was a healthcare worker and needed a little financial help. She consistently dressed nicely to pick up any government assistance needed.

I didn’t realize it at the time but that was her gift to me.

Fast forward to the present and absolutely no one is capable of bringing me down.

Pride is power. Knowing when you need extra help is also power.

You can be powerful, regardless of your income level or socioeconomic status.

Practice humility

In his article from Psychology Today, Dr. Enright, Ph.D. quotes; “Humility is seeing the truth about oneself so that pride or narcissism does not dominate”. There’s a fine line between confidence and arrogance. Arrogance highlights insecurity in the worst way. Knowing when to accept being wrong, or owning a mistake with sincere humility, and without shame is the first step. The most influential people in today’s world have humility, the Dalai Lama, Barack Obama and Princess Diana, just to name a few.

Take accountability

Leaders have learned to take responsibility for their team members. A true leader who holds power seen through the eyes of others always takes accountability for the positive as well as the negative. A powerful leader will lead by example and have others looking to them for advice. This is an organic form of power. Taking responsibility for your own actions, or taking responsibility for work done by your team will fast-track you to leadership.

Seek intrinsic power

The power I held while entering the food bank was already within me. I held onto that power and wouldn’t let a circumstance, especially one beyond my control diminish it. Every person has this power. It’s on us to harvest this power. Choosing to go for a walk, or a hike can remind us, or teach us that we hold our own power. Fresh air and nature, trees and ocean connect with us on a spiritual level, if we let it.

An article was written in The Daily Mail discussing the positive correlations between nature, body image and self-esteem. Professor Swami suggested “[nature] may promote a sense of physical empowerment that is characteristic of body appreciation.” Personally, whenever I need a pick-me-up, I will go for a walk. Self-esteem is essential when it comes to intrinsic power.

Believe you deserve it

One significant mistake many of us make is thinking that we are incapable of holding power.

That is simply not true.

Each of us is entitled to holding our own power. We are all capable of reaching for what we want. A friend of mine always reminds me, “Never sell yourself short” and he’s right. Thinking something is beyond reach is the fastest way to ensure it is.

Maintain loyalty

According to The Insider, loyalty to your company and the relationship we have with our employers exceeds performance. It’s tricky, on one hand, we want everyone to like us, yet we also want to be seen as a strong contender for promotion. It’s a fine line to have a positive relationship with your employer and your colleagues. This is where authenticity comes in. Be yourself, be your best version of yourself in front of your employer, and be a good colleague to your coworkers or staff. Offering to help, or being a confidant when needed will keep you in that perfect place, and boost how others see you.

Never stop learning

Knowledge is paramount to power. Whether it’s via traditional education, or through personal reading, education is ongoing and never-ending. In fact, there are a plethora of courses online that can excel your skills. Some courses will cost, however many are free. MOOC-Massive Open Online Learning has taken education to a new level. MOOC offers courses ranging from interior design to global health and engineering to social sciences and even coding. These are free courses from accredited universities around the globe. There is a fee if you want actual certification, but the fee is relatively affordable.

This education also looks great on the sidebar of your CV or resume. I’ve discussed in depth the benefits of continued education here.

Knowledge also correlates to self-assurance and intrinsic power. Educating oneself is the fastest and most successful method of gaining well-deserved respect and accreditation.

Act the part

I once had a friend tell me that he liked the way I entered a room. I held my head up and didn’t look at my feet, or slouch my shoulders. This was news to me. I never saw myself that way until then. Thanks to my mother once again, I learned how to feel proud, without arrogance. Whether we are the least successful, least rich or least educated in a room, a strong posture is everything. Shoulders back, head up and feel proud, even if you’re faking it because you deserve to have pride in yourself. Let others see this.

In summary, intrinsic confidence is within all of us. It’s there for us to nourish and bring forward. Extrinsic power is also there for the taking. Reach out and grab it, because that’s exactly how everyone else that we see as powerful did it. They reached out, they believed in themselves and they took it. It’s yours, it’s free and it’s time. Go for it!

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