Fear of Failure, Hidden in Our DNA?

One of the most important, but also dangerous fears of people is the fear of failure, being considered by specialists as a very difficult psychological threshold to cross.

The fear of not being good, of not performing in a certain area of ​​life, pulls us back, puts barriers in our way, and restricts our choices, so that, many times, we don't even get a chance to try. Fear of failure is based on two other important fears: fear of rejection and fear of criticism.

Successful people end up in a higher position in life, precisely because they manage to get rid of the fear of failure. This means that the fear of failure is the main cause of failure in life.

People who have come to know success regard failures as mere bad results, equating them with important opportunities for self-improvement. People who do not achieve success believe that their mistakes are permanent, real condemnations to suffering.

Fear of failure is synonymous with the fear of not being accepted

At the basis of evolution, in prehistoric times, our ancestors concluded that the chances of survival are much higher if they unite in a single group, in a community. Thus, they could defend each other, have different responsibilities and skills, and organize themselves to meet their needs efficiently.

If an individual was expelled from the tribe, he was sentenced to death. Thus, according to the psychologist, the fear of failure is, in fact, the fear of not being accepted by society, of not being accepted by the community you belong to or aspire to. In other words, basically, behind the fear of failure is the instinct to survive.

Desire vs. necessity

To annihilate or cure the fear of failure, it is very important, according to the psychologist's advice, to make the exact difference between necessity and desire. To survive we need to meet some minor conditions: we need water, food, and shelter.

What exceeds this strictly necessary is called desire and represents a fictitious need, a qualitative or quantitative step. In other words, the need means to live with a minimum of food that will bring us the necessary nutrients, and desire is the satisfaction of culinary pleasure. An apartment or a house is a necessity, but the number of rooms or floors is a wish.

Unfortunately, most of us confuse these two goals and tend to accumulate as many material reserves as possible to feel at peace and peace. However, the emotional need increases and, with it, the fear of failure appears. Why? Because we tend to constantly relate to others, to seek their appreciation, to seek to make ourselves useful or even indispensable, and thus to ensure the necessities for survival.

In other words, we will be constantly on the lookout to protect what we have achieved and to produce more. On the other hand, the fear of failure materializes through withdrawal, through stagnation because the fear of taking risks, making decisions, and accepting other responsibilities will be accentuated so that there is no possibility of making mistakes and losing what is already we have.

Fear of failure must be addressed

Fear of failure causes changes emotionally but also physiologically. In time you will notice that you will experience anxiety, you will lose your motivation, you will no longer take risks, you will gather hatred and resentment and you will end up in depression.

At the same time, your immune system will be affected and, implicitly, your health. Taken to the extreme, the effort to be accepted in society, in a certain environment, turns into a trap and the desire will return like a boomerang.

The specialist advises us to try to move away from these beliefs and not to tend to belong to a group. At the same time, let's try to find ourselves and discover new vocations and talents that will fulfill us.

It is useful to start acting and persevere regardless of whether we encounter a failure at the first turn. It should not be taken personally but should be transformed into an asset, an example, and a new motivation.