Do Not Sink, Start Swimming

Depression is no laughing matter. Personally speaking, I have had my fair share of depressed days, rage out moments, and times where I felt my world was coming to an end. Life is what you make of it, so what do you do when you feel like life has no meaning? You make lemonade, what I mean is that you get up and you do not just pop a pill and think that your bad day or life for that matter will just disappear. Get up and get moving. Push yourself to work out, find a hobby to do, get with a support group if you do not have family that will be understanding. Go to therapy not just to see a psychiatrist but an actual therapist. When life gives you lemons you make lemonade. Get up, throw away the shackles of the pity party you are throwing for yourself and look in the mirror and say I am stronger than the problems that I am facing. My life has to mean something greater than what I can only see. My purpose may be unknown to me right now but I will find it as I keep involving myself in positive things, skill sets, and align myself with good people. The saying that you are who you hang around is so true. I have had some bad people I used to call friends in my life and they took from me until I felt like I had nothing left to myself. I got to the point where I cut off so many people I was the only person left in my circle. I felt paranoid like trusting people was something very difficult to do even though I had done it so many times in the past with ease. I had felt like I was spent and I could not give any more compassion from my heart.

I would wake up and look in the mirror and say, "You disgusting individual, I hate you." I really stopped giving a damn about who I was, what my future goals were, and what truly made me happy inside. I was in what I would like to call a perpetual slump of inactivity. This slump is the reason why a lot of people can have great jobs and great opportunities and either not take them or be in the right place and the right time and still be miserable even when everything is going right for them. I was in that slump of inactivity and I did not want to leave the comfort zone I had created for myself. I was content with remaining a child for a while longer in my parents' house while I licked the wounds of my shattered ego and broken spirit. I did not want to move forward. I started eating more food and working out less, feeling less and less happy with myself each day. I got to the point where I needed to remember what made me a man who got things done. So now I am currently applying to different jobs and also in school trying to get through the semester and feel meaning in my life again. Life is what you make of it, I am working on myself every day and just want others to do the same. Get up and work out, get a job, and set a savings goal to treat yourself to a trip out of the country, start a new hobby, learn a new life skill that you did not previously know. Learn to love your flaws and grow past those imperfections to become a better you.