Dear New Year

Dear New Year

Ah, 2021, just seeing you on my page is a refreshing sight. Resting calmly at the bottom right-hand corner of my screen. A subtle reminder we are not where we once were, even with how we feel. As much as I’m looking forward to what you’ll bring, I feel as though your predecessor must be addressed before we rush forward.

2020…You haven’t been so cruel to me as you have been to others, and for that perhaps I owe you thanks. For I am grateful. The waves of turmoil you’ve washed the world with haven’t quite knocked me off my axis. When you began, I wasn’t where I wanted to be, I wasn’t who I wanted to be, and didn’t have the things I wished for. Now arguably, I’m still there. I’m unemployed once again, I haven’t progressed in becoming the writer I’ve always fancied being, nor do I have all I wished for. But does anyone?

2020 you’ve given me much more than I thought wishes could grant. Long after the wounds you’ve left on these twelve months heal, I’ll know the bloodshed was worth it. The tears and uncertainty have paid off with riches far more valuable than gold. You’ve given me, not one, but two best friends. My four-legged companion, I consider more my baby. Even though I’ve had pets before I never knew how much they could mean to you. And you nearly took him away, shattering my heart for a measly day. A harsh lesson you were trying to teach me maybe? But you gave him back, showed me, people, I’d never met before banding together to help bring my doggo home. The willing kindness of strangers was inspiring. As Mark Frost said, “there is no light without darkness…” no matter how much I wished that wasn’t true, he’s clearly right.

You’ve given me someone who I’d do anything for, you’ve given me someone to love. A man who’s taught me what it truly means to be loved. Because of you 2020 I haven’t gotten the chance to hold his hand as we walked through the local fair yet. We didn’t get to win overpriced prizes off rigged games or take silly pictures in photo booths. We didn’t get the chance to see Green Day or Three Days Grace together or kiss drunk in the uber after we left the bar with our friends. And though you’ve kept us all on such a tight leash, six feet away from connecting. I forgive you 2020.

Because you gave me endless long walks and laughs with my two best friends. You’ve given me romantic nights of board games and countless movies. You’ve made me Aunty Orca to two wonderful little monsters and kept my family safe from sickness. I’ve tasted happy tears and sad tears with you 2020. Despite how I couldn’t see the city lights with my love, I’ve gotten to lay underneath the stars with him. We haven’t seen live music together, but we’ve sung to each other. And we didn’t get to know any other parts of the world, but we got to know one another. You didn’t give many people what they wanted 2020, but you’ve gifted me what I needed.

Thank you 2020 for breaking my heart and putting it back together, quite an obscene number of times. Thank you for giving me a view of the world from an upside-down perspective. And Thank you for finally coming to an end. As for me in 2021, or as I should say…

Dear New Year Erica, I hope you find what our old friend 2020 stole from us. I wish others to find their feelings of normalcy and get back their sense of home again. More than anything I hope you find your freedom. Not all years can be the best years, but if you can make it be just a little better than last year, I think you’ll be doing alright.

Thanks for reading Kindstranger.