Build a successful marriage

Today, I would like to discuss the essential skills needed to build a successful marriage. Firstly, I want to express my gratitude to all my subscribers, and I encourage those who haven't subscribed yet to join in the conversation. We are a community dedicated to creating happy and thriving marriages. The first skill I want to emphasize is compassion. Many people wonder if compassion can be considered a skill. The answer is yes. Compassion requires intentionality. It is not something that happens by chance; rather, it stems from a genuine desire to be compassionate towards your partner. Let's define compassion: it is the ability to understand and empathize with others' suffering and the motivation to take action. When you actively cultivate compassion in your relationship, you seek to understand and address your spouse's concerns. For example, if your partner struggles with cooking on traditional stoves, you may consider purchasing a gas stove to alleviate their difficulties. Compassion is a skill that extends beyond marriage; it is valuable in all aspects of life, whether at work or in relationships with neighbors. The second skill is teamwork. Couples who do not work together will struggle to progress. The synergy created through teamwork is crucial in various settings, including the workplace and businesses. Unfortunately, many of us have grown up in environments where everyone is focused on their own tasks, even within our families. Instead of competing with our siblings, we should be collaborating to develop our homes. It is essential to replace self-sufficiency with the skill of teamwork. Working as a team allows couples to plan together, contribute to the development of their home, and effectively manage their family, including raising children and acquiring assets. Lastly, forgiveness is a vital skill in any relationship. As humans, we are prone to making mistakes. Holding onto past wrongdoings can be detrimental to a marriage. Instead, it is crucial to cultivate the skill of forgiving and forgetting. This means letting go of grudges and not dwelling on past errors. Forgiveness requires intentionality and understanding its importance in building a successful marriage. Keeping a record of your spouse's wrongdoings will only lead to trouble. True love, as mentioned in 1 Corinthians 13, does not keep a record of wrongs. It erases them, allowing for the growth of a strong relationship. In conclusion, developing skills such as compassion, teamwork, and forgiveness is essential for building a successful marriage. These skills require intentionality, understanding, and a commitment to growth. By actively cultivating these skills, couples can create a loving and thriving partnership.

How many times should you forgive your spouse, whether it's your wife or husband? According to Jesus' response to Peter, the answer is 77 times seven times a day. Forgiveness is a crucial skill that plays a significant role in a successful marriage. Patience, the fourth skill, is also essential. It involves bearing and believing in your partner's ability to change. Coming from different backgrounds, there may be simple issues that, without patience, could lead to unnecessary fights. These fights could arise from something as trivial as the use of a specific toothpaste or the management of resources, such as money or charcoal. I recently heard a story about a couple who fought over the wife's mismanagement of charcoal. The husband expected her to properly store the charcoal and pour water on it so that it could be reused the next day. However, the wife carelessly let the charcoal burn out, leaving only ashes. The husband saw this as a sign of her mismanagement and carelessness. In situations like these, patience is necessary for understanding and transformation to occur. Lastly, listening is a skill that many of us struggle with. While we may hear what our spouses are saying, we often fail to truly listen and understand their perspective. Listening requires actively meditating on what is being said and responding based on the foundation from which they are speaking. It is crucial to pay careful attention to what your spouse is telling you, process it, and respond accordingly. These five skills - compassion, teamwork, forgiveness, patience, and listening - are vital for building a successful and fulfilling marriage. While there are many more skills to consider, focusing on developing these five will contribute significantly to a happy and harmonious relationship.