Be Offended - Why You Should Attack

People are not nearly ready enough to attack. Today someone on twitter said she was inexplicably blocked by an acquaintance. I replied, “Well that’s odd. I’ve never spotted you being the least bit controversial, political, or anything that might rub anyone up the wrong way. And that is why you have zero name recognition, no followers, and no options in life to get ahead. "

Fortunately that was offensive to a random stranger who hopped in to start a fight. I immediately took them down with a serious of biting satirical snark pieces that left them crying for their mommas as I laughed and laughed and laughed.

The good thing with people going on the offensive is that it can really increase the pleasure of social media. We’re all tiptoeing around, trying to be sensitive and politically correct and make the most inane comments. And, the attackers are always there ready to point out how stupid we are, how shitty are writing is, etc. It is fuckin hilarious.

The good thing about going on the attack is that the reaction is meaningless to you, but it often devastates the victim. By getting het-up about people’s remarks — regardless of whether they’re deliberately malicious or just unintentionally stupid — you’re actually doing yourself and the entire world a favor. By refusing to chill, you’re making everyone else feel stressed, anxious, unhappy. And that’s great for your mental health and who gives a shit about the rest of the planet.

To feel smug, more self satisfied, and more pissed in our everyday lives, we need to let these things annoy us more easily. Look at what people say and hold those words against them, regardless of their intentions, be they good or bad. Most people’s intentions are not to make you feel bad. Those people are giant wusses. Thoughtlessness or even thoughtfulness should automatically have to turn into a war.

I saw someone get offended recently when someone called them weird and short, and one person got offended when a random stranger rewrote an article she had published online, turning it from a boring snooze fest into an intelligent, captivating, and thought provoking commentary on modern day social media mores that was serious but also somehow hilarious at the same time, simply by reversing the intent of the original piece and adding tons of clever wordplay. She felt like he was stealing her work even though he clearly was not and was obviously a far superior writer and intellect in addition to be a much better person overall.

Now, imagine how much more pissed we’d all feel if we took every single comment someone made as a personal insult. I mean weird is really harsh right! It doesn't matter if short is true or perception you should be very offended if anybody calls you short. And getting pissed about someone plagiarizing your work even though they clearly are not, well better to just get furiously angry, report him to the editorial and/or censorship boards and the web platform where he currently publishes and accuse him of copyright infringement. Hopefully they will suspend his account with only a perfunctory investigation in a secrecy shrouded process within which he has no ability to participate or contribute, just like another web publishing platform did in a similar situation on two separate occasions in the very recent past. Exactly like him you can get as irate as you like about it, but you are powerless to change anything and the sooner you recognize this the better for your mental health.

Now let’s apply these principles to our lives with some top tips…

Always assume the worst in people

It’s much better for our mental health to assume that people are awful and are all basically out to get you. If you work on the assumption that the vast majority of people would kill you as soon as look at you, are committed to offending you at every opportunity, and relish in hurting you both mentally and physically, then you can stew in anger about almost any remarks, with oh shit, they really are out get me. They are doing their best to insult me.

If you believe this, it can make all kinds of comments impossible to take without massive retaliation.

True of false has nothing to do with it

The other thing to consider when you’re about to take offence, is whether something is actually true — or might be patently false. If what is being said is true or if it is not true, get offended by it. Recognize it for the underhanded hit job it is and return fire with everything you've got. Take no prisoners and show no mercy.

Let things fester

Everyone says thoughtless things most of the time — it’s best to get super pissed about it. But if you can’t do that right away let the words and associated feelings fester for a bit before hitting back. That’s bad for your enemies mental health and a net neutral for your own.

If things are going over and over in your head, making you anxious and depressed, it might help to contact the person and challenge them to a mano y mano brawl or old fashioned duel. A simple fuck you might make the world of difference.

Social media

Social media is a hotbed of disagreement and trolling. It absolutely kicks ass. Even the most innocuous opinions can attract someone itching for a fight which is one of the things that makes it so great. For this reason, I tend to only post opinions, and avoid stating facts or even caring if what I say is true or false (see above).

For the most part, if you want a quiet life, you are a major wuss and social media may not be the best place for you. Or if you want to try and wuss it up anyway with some week kneed light hearted crap, accept that people will mercilessly attack you until you cry. That’s OK. Not everyone will be all that good at making you cry, but many will be. Piss or get off the pot.

Their is no such thing as "small stuff"

It’s hard to chill when you cannot walk away or ignore a situation, which is why you should never try and do this. Instead you need to get unduly stressed about every thing anybody says no matter how "small"

Feel the power of the darkside

Relish the power of the darkside in life. Life is full of ups and downs and often, people are so immersed in problems and difficulties that they fail to understand and appreciate the power of the darkside in any situation. The darkside might take a little more rage to appreciate, but there often is a dark side. Perhaps if you didn’t get a job, you had reservations anyway, and there might be an opportunity around the corner to make anyone who ever doubted you pay for their insolence.

Accentuate the negatives in difficult situations and by taking a pissed off approach to life, you’ll feel more annoyed and be unable to think clearly when you’re faced with different challenges.