5 Life-Changing Pieces of Advice

"I would go back to my little man and say," Light up. Don't worry. Relax. Don't worry so much about everything. Try not to be caught today by worrying yesterday or tomorrow. ’” ~ Bill Nighy

I believe there is great power in looking back on the past to learn from our experiences, mistakes, and regrets.

Spanish philosopher George Santayana stated, "Those who do not read history are doomed to repeat it." I would add that the history we need to learn the most is our own history so that we do not make the same mistakes over and over again in our lives.

If I had the option to go back to my past, this is the advice I would give my little one.

1. Speak freely and work to overcome your shyness.

In the past, there were many opportunities I didn't take advantage of and many friendships I failed to make because I was shy and often felt uncomfortable and self-conscious. Some people described me as ashamed of my shyness, so it paralyzed me in many ways.

Tip to me:

Make a conscious effort to communicate and express yourself freely among others, no matter how uncomfortable you may feel at the moment. When fighting, take a deep breath to relax and calm down your unreasonable thoughts.

No one is judging and analyzing you as you can imagine. Everyone is so focused on their country to spend time taking care of every little thing you say and do.

Try to do the opposite of what a shy person would do in any situation. Easy to say than do, I know, but if you do that long enough, you will start to make a new identity in your mind. This is exactly what you need to do in order to overcome shyness. The more you do, the easier it will be to find and trust where you will be, and soon you will feel natural.

2. Stop fighting your bad feelings.

For a very long time, I will try to fight against my negative feelings, such as anxiety, in the hope that they will go some way. When I felt that normal node in my stomach and started thinking anxious thoughts, I was telling myself that I should be hopeful because our thoughts create our reality.

A few years ago, I finally realized that the way to free yourself from negative emotions, as opposed to sounding like it sounds, is to accept it.

The more we try to counteract our emotions with the basic thought, "I shouldn't feel this way," we feel worse. However, these feelings pass very quickly when we allow ourselves to be heard without judging him or thinking that they should not have happened.

Tip to me:

Stop the need to try to fix your negative feelings with your mind.

Accept your negative emotions and concentrate on the emotions that you are trying to create instead of thinking about such things as "I shouldn't have felt this way," "This should not happen."

If you do this, you will find that the unpleasant feelings dissolve very quickly, and you will stop making things worse by feeding yourself with more energy.

View your feelings as guests, because they are always present. Like most visitors, they want your attention and consent, and as long as you give them what they want, they will be on their way.

3. Accept uncertainty.

In college, I spent a lot of time trying to find my future, wanting clarity on what to do with my life.

Most of us have a compelling need for the rest of our lives to be available. We hate not knowing where life may lead us, and we need comfort in knowing what the future holds.

But no amount of psychological analysis of our future can provide us with answers. And that's okay, because we don't always need to know what we're going to do a year from now.

Sometimes the only thing you can do is trust life. Because when we do not trust, we automatically start to worry, because that is the natural tendency of our mind.

Tip to me:

Know that it is okay to be confused and not have all the answers. Learn righteousness in ignorance and create a place of wonder and mystery, because that is a big part of what makes life fun and interesting.

Most of your fears and anxieties about the future, if you take a closer look, are nothing but imagination and nothing but your mind. Most of the things you worry about won’t actually happen, and even if they do, you can learn and grow from what happened. So there is no need to take your fears for granted and work on them.

4. Stop trying to escape insecurity.

Our mind loves to choose popular and luxurious and loves to find an easy way to feel good.

We often hesitate to do things that require effort or make us feel uncomfortable, because our natural tendency is to avoid feeling any discomfort.

But many of the things that benefit us and are worth doing in life will require that we endure some form of discomfort. To escape insecurity is to flee growing and growing as a person.

That is exactly what I have done for the rest of my life. I avoided meditation, exercise, writing journals, and spending time alone without technology - habits that have had a positive impact on my life - at times when I would benefit most because I felt resilient whenever I tried to start.

I also avoided being in danger with other people. But I have seen for the past two years that if I always had the discomfort of communicating with young people instead of running away, as I always did, meeting together is rewarding and enjoyable.

Tip to me:

The mind can be very persuasive and convincing and come up with an endless list of reasons to postpone or avoid feeling uncomfortable. But do not let your mind deceive you.

Discomfort often points to what you should be doing, not what you should be avoiding.