2021 and Hopeful

Dear Future Kaitlyn,

It's crazy to be writing to my January 1st 2022 self already, especially since 2020 brought us so many unknowns! But, here we are, 2021 and hopeful.

Do you remember your 2020 intention word? Creativity? You crushed that word by the way -- embracing a creative lifestyle to the fullest, trying new things left, right, and center ... I'm so proud of you!

Now, I'm hoping you've kept that same spirit in 2021, because at the time of writing this, you NEED this word in your life: Balance.

Maybe 'balance' means something different by 2022, but as I'm writing this it means:

* Reading more -- to be a good writer, you also need to READ (and you LOVE reading!); get yourself out of the reading slumps by picking up a book you know you love, or a book you've been excited to read for awhile

* Taking on more of the responsibilities around the house -- boyfriend does so much, the least you can do is stop writing for 30 minutes and wash some dishes or sweep the floor

* Making time for connections, as best as you can with pandemic restrictions -- call your parents more often, Skype your friends, send people messages out of the blue saying "Hey, I was thinking of you!"

* Eating properly -- not dieting, just making healthier choices (remember, you've been feeling unhealthy for years)

* Moving more -- you sit far too much; when was the last time you had a mini dance party?

* Being mindful with my money -- knowing when to save and when it's okay to spend

* Not taking on too much -- prioritize your creative ideas; I know, you get ALL the ideas and you get excited by all of them (or you have shiny-object syndrome with the new ones), but FOCUS ... also, don't try to do one project in one day; break it up in smaller chunks, that way you COULD do more than one at once (feel into each one, stop if something doesn't feel right)

Now, here's a reminder, in case you needed it: Grandpa is still with you. I know, it'll be just over two years by the time you're reading this, and you're about to celebrate a third birthday without a phone call from him. It'll never stop being weird, not having someone in your life anymore who you phoned once a month and chatted with for over an hour. But you need to remember he loved you, and you need to hold onto him.

I'm not sure if he's watching over you, but his spirit and essence will remain with you until the day you die. He was great man -- generous, kind-hearted, well-rounded, and he knew what he wanted out of life. (Not sure how long it took him to reach that point, but that's how you knew him for the almost-26 years he was physically in your life.)

His legacy lives on in his sons, and in his grandchildren -- especially you. The little ones never had the opportunity to know him like you did. Your bond was special -- it is STILL special. Hold onto that, and continue to make him proud. Begin living your life, if you haven't already by the end of 2021.

You have other people who are counting on you to live your best life as well. Your parents, and your brothers (especially the younger one!). A few friends you've kept over the years. And, of course, the boyfriend.

Are you still with J? I hope so ... he's the love of your life -- I know it, he knows it, everyone around you knows it. Just like Grandpa, J is also a great man ... I still believe Grandpa waited until he knew J would be in my life for awhile, to help me through the grief but also to take over as my personal cheerleader.

J did A LOT for you in 2020 -- he saw your worst anxiety moments, supported your decision to change careers, and said yes to moving in together when the world turned upside down. He deserves your best self as much as you deserve your best self. So, if working on your life balance for your own self wasn't motivating enough, I REALLY hope doing it for J was.

I'm excited to see what 2021 brings, and also see how you've done with your intentions! I have so much faith in you, Kaitlyn. You are constantly growing and evolving. You won't be the same Kaitlyn in 2022 as you were in 2021, or 2020, or 2019 ... or ever. Don't ever stop learning, don't ever stop improving.

Final words: You are worthy, and your voice has value.

Love you lots,

KD