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What The Fuck is Wrong With People?

Shopping etiquette during COVID-19

By Amanda LyonsPublished 4 years ago 11 min read
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Photo by Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas from Pexels

Ok, what the fuck is going on? People have taken leave of their senses. Their good senses that allow them to treat all of humanity with respect or at least civility. That flew out the window in the past two weeks. I have seen people's behavior get exponentially worse as the days go by and America finds more and more cases of coronavirus, but really...what the fuck?

Yes, it's a pretty bad virus. Yes, a lot of people have died from it and believe me I am not belittling that in the least. It's very sad that our nation cannot follow social distancing instructions or even self quarantine techniques to help others that are at more risk than they are. And for what? Yeast to make bread? A game of Uno? Teriyaki sauce? A boundless supply of fucking toilet paper?! Really.

I've worked in retail for almost seventeen years and while customers have been shits off and on, some of them are really shining in their terrible behavior. Maybe I'm old-fashioned but I believe in common decency and common sense, both of which seem to be in short supply and steadily dwindling even as I write this. I have seen some nasty people over the years, truly despicable. Don't get me wrong some customers have been very kind, considerate, and understanding through this whole debacle and they are the ones I'm truly grateful for but damn do the nasty ones out weight the good ones by a mile.

I get that we're all in a panic with all the closings and a lot of people fear that grocery stores could be next. I REALLY don't see that happening to be honest. We have need based commodities for our communities and we're trying everything we can to help. Even though with what I've seen from some of these customers I think they barely deserve our hard work. Especially with how certain companies treat their workers but that's another story for another time.

What makes humanity so awesome, in my belief, is our sense of morality. I'm not talking about religious morality, lord we'd be here for weeks for that. I'm talking about how we treat others or choose to treat them. We can take the high road or the low. In retail it's mostly the low road because for some reason some customers believe we, as retail workers, are below them. It's enough that some of our managers, supervisors, and decision makers for the company already feel that way and treat us like garbage and we have to just grin and bear it for the most part. But facing abuse from nasty customers has become a daily occurrence, it's almost a rite of passage. When I see the new recruits all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed ready to start their careers in retail, it takes everything in my soul to not scream at them to run for the hills. Throw that badge on the floor and run!

Since I and many of my co-workers have shared stories with each other about the horrid behavior of some customers I feel I should share some tips with them and other curious customers on how to properly shop like an intelligent human being instead of a lazy, self-entitled piece of shit.

These guidelines can be used in regular non-panic mode as well...imagine that!

But for now I'll share the most important ones to remember when shopping during the virus outbreak.

First, and I can't stress this enough, treat every other person around you as if they were a person. As if they were your elderly mother or grandfather. Have a care people. We are all in this together, you are not special. Sorry, not sorry. Get over yourself.

Second, don't bring small children or babies with you unless absolutely necessary. If you have to please keep them covered for their sake because who knows what all these people are spreading unaware of it. Remember, anyone could be carrying this virus without showing symptoms and they could be spreading it by thinking they're safe.

Third, please keep in mind everyone else is there to buy what you're looking for as well, so help your neighbor out by not stockpiling or hoarding. Our company finally put limits on how much people could buy and they ARE ENFORCING it. I don't know how many people I saw with carts full of water, milk, juice, toilet paper, etc. Like it's the end of the world and a little butt wipe is gonna help!

Fourth, DO NOT get mad at retail workers for these new procedures and policies. We do not make any important decisions for the company and it makes me laugh uncontrollably at people for thinking the those in charge would even deign to listen to our suggestions for a better run company. All the new rules, policies, regulations, etc come directly from people around the CEO. We at store level have no hand in this. The nasty customer is complaining to the wrong person. Your complaints fall on deaf ears.

Fifth, this is not the time for leisurely, weekly shopping trips with the whole family. We're supposed to be staying at home so the spread stops. So, STAY AT HOME IF YOU DON'T NEED GROCERIES. You could be putting others at risk and this is unbelievably selfish considering how fragile others health could be. On another note, do not talk on the phone while shopping, do not drag your feet, stop in the middle of an aisle and take up space unnecessarily. People are in a panic and in there to get essentials. Get out of their way. Behaving in this way, too, is unbelievably selfish. Panicking and buying everything on the shelf is wrong but acting like nothing is wrong can be even worse. I've seen so many people on the phone talking about how there's nothing on the shelf, taking pictures, and facetiming to prove it. YES, there is nothing on the shelf. Move on to the next aisle. Be quick when you shop so you can get back to your family and stay out of harms way. Make a list of essentials before you come to shop so you know exactly where to go and don't waste any time. This brings me to my next tip.

Sixth, for the love of god, read the signs that are posted all around the stores. They are there for the customer. They tell you where everything is. Ketchup is a condiment, it will be in, you guessed it, the condiment aisle. I find it VERY hard to believe that people can't find what they need by reading these signs. There must be some thinking and education in those brains. Look up, signs are posted all around. Reading the signs not only will most likely get you to the item you need but it will get you there quicker without having to try to find someone to ask, and who knows if that person is even familiar with that item or department. With the atmosphere as it is a lot of retail workers are being shifted to help stock in areas they've never been in, so guess what? They won't know everything about that area. But I bet customers can drudge up some common sense and figure 'hey, I'm looking for tissues, I bet they're with the toilet paper because they're like items'. That's all it takes really. I always get the excuse that customers are from another store and the layout is different. The layout....maybe....but what's in the department....no. Once again read signs.

Seventh, if we are out of something we do NOT have it 'in the back'. I don't know how many times I've been asked to 'check in the back'. There is nothing back there to check. The emptying of shelves has given us a unique opportunity to purge the warehouse, which by the way is VERY different than a distribution center (I have an inkling that a lot of people confuse the two), so everything has been emptied. Everything that CAN go on the shelf especially in grocery, pharmacy, and toiletries IS on the shelves. The only thing in our warehouse is Easter candy! Also, never get mad at a worker if the store is out of something, it's not our fault AT ALL. We cannot order items, that happens automatically (at least at our store), we are not the ones buying two or three of each thing that you might've wanted as well, we cannot stock what hasn't arrived yet.

Eighth, please follow regular traffic patterns while walking in the stores. Many people walk on the wrong side and impede traffic, many people cut others off and cause pile ups of people and carts. Do not stop in the middle of an aisle to 'hang out', let me be honest, I don't know what the hell these people are doing! There are a lot of people in these stores shopping for necessities nowadays, we could all be better at being considerate of the person in front of us by not smashing our cart into their heels while also not cutting off someone behind you because you're too lazy to turn around to check before leaning over across the aisle to reach an item. Also, do NOT park your cart on one side of the aisle while you stand on the other trying to choose which Chunky you want. These aisles are designed so that you can fit three carts abreast. Keep your cart with you that way you're not in anyone else's way, it's there when you need it, and people aren't tempted to steal what's in your cart while you're not looking. Do not drag your cart behind you either. I know it's hard to see where you're going while pushing your cart but have patience, you WILL get around that corner. Just nose out inch by inch so you don't hit someone. Don't worry, they WILL see you coming and get out of your way. Dragging a cart behind you takes up too much space and tempts people to steal out of your cart because you are not keeping an eye on it.

Ninth, don't bring the whole family. Why would you want to anyway? Make them stay home where it's safe and they won't be exposed to people that could possibly be carrying the virus.

Tenth, do not use this time as an excuse to try to get away with depraved behavior. Do not act like this is a fucking party, it is NOT. I've noticed several groups of people just coming in to hang out and witness all the madness. You are risking yourself and others while getting in our way. Also, don't use this time to be a fucking creep. I don't know how many men I've seen in the past couple weeks just walking around with no groceries staring at women, like they're fucking animals. AND WOMEN ALWAYS BE AWARE OF YOUR SURROUNDINGS.

Eleventh, this is the most important by far- treat the people that work at these stores with respect. There is absolutely NO excuse for abusive behavior toward the staff. Absolutely none. We are putting not only ourselves at risk but our families as well. There is no social distancing happening in stores now. Everyone is much closer than six feet to me. I've been smushed up against strangers. We have no control over what is happening just like you don't. We are not mad because we 'have' to work. We don't. Our company has a contingency plan for those of us who don't feel comfortable coming to work because of the virus so guess what? Those that are working CHOOSE to be there! Despite all the nasty abuse we get from some customers we still choose to come to work because we want to help. Because we have good work ethic and we want to make a difference. We should be treated way better than we are by some people. We should be acknowledged for this and appreciated because if we all get sick because you don't want to stay home when you should, guess what happens? No stocking and no cashiers which results in less items to purchase with longer waiting times while checking out in the self checkout.

I know not all of you out there are nasty and believe me I am so grateful for your presence, it is truly appreciated, now more than ever! A kind word, even a smile, goes a long way to brighten our day. To those of you who were offended by this article, congratulations you are part of the problem, now modify your behavior. I promise you being nice to people will make you feel better, it really will. Try it.

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About the Creator

Amanda Lyons

Eclectic stream of consciousness and dark surrealism. What photography does for life I do for thought, emotions, and experiences. The genres can range from romance to horror but my favorite is suspense.

[email protected]

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