What Happens When You Cry?

Yes, I cry.

But what makes me cry?

You may ask me. ‘Aren’t you a man? Don’t you feel ashamed of crying?’

Yes, in Eastern culture, men are literally not allowed to cry.

Crying is often seen as a sign of cowardice or weakness, or wrongly associated with being “like a woman”.

However, I do not accept or validate this traditional concept. It is unacceptable to demean women by portraying them as cowardly, weak or inferior in any way.

But I cry.

I cry without any hesitation.

I cry often, and I do not feel ashamed or weak for doing so.

I do not care what society thinks when I cry, or how the people around me judge me.

I cry, not because I am sad.

I cry not because I am unhappy, or because I have lost something important.

I cry not because I am distant from those I love.

I cry while reading novels or watching TV, movies and dramas. When I connect the stories to moments from my own life, the emotions rise, and tears fill my eyes.

It is empathy. The ability to feel another person’s pain as if it were my own.

Today, while scrolling through my TikTok page, I stopped at an account (@mariangelaserrano) of a Venezuelan girl who lives outside the country. She was expressing her joy over the arrest of the dictator Nicolás Maduro and his wife.

She was commenting that

It is not enough for me that they took him and his wife. It wouldn’t be enough if he spent the rest of his life in jail, being rotten, being bitten, tortured. It wouldn’t be enough because of the damage that he has caused. The whole regime has caused harm to millions of people. I am talking generations. They have taken everything. I am displaced in a different part of the world because of what’s taking place in my country.

She was literally crying in the video, yet at the same time, she seemed genuinely happy.

Personally, I am against the incident in which Donald Trump had Maduro forcibly taken.

However, I could deeply feel her pain and frustration. Her tears brought tears to my own eyes.

I cannot hold back my tears, and I choose not to hide them. Rather, I let them roll freely down my cheek.

For me, this is normal. In fact, it is normal for every human being. Yet people try to hide their tears, because our society teaches that men should not cry.

When I watch movies, I often notice people beside me growing uncomfortable. They try hard to hold back their tears. They don’t want others to see the tears in their eyes. Or they try to pretend they are unaffected.

Why hold the tears back?

Crying is not a weakness. It is a deeply human quality that shows kindness, sensitivity and empathy.

Those who cry are people who connect deeply with the feelings and situations of others. They can sense and imagine the pain and grief others are going through.

As I mentioned earlier, Eastern cultures are often dominated by patriarchy, where masculinity is celebrated, and feminine characteristics are demeaned.

They often portray femininity as soft, delicate and weak, and tasks are segregated accordingly, assigning women roles that are assumed not to require strength.

Although Western societies have made significant progress in challenging these outdated beliefs, women are still treated as inferior in many sectors.

Whether you are a man or a woman, there is no need to hide your tears.

There is no need to hold them back.

Let them roll down.

Even science agrees; crying heals.

Our eyes fill with tears during intense emotions such as happiness, sadness, joy and stress.

Tears are not just water; they contain stress hormones and endorphins such as leucine-enkephalin, which help calm the body by activating the parasympathetic nervous system.

For these reasons, when we cry, we often feel relieved of our physical and emotional pain, as tears act as a natural stress reliever and social signal for support.

Therefore, cry without any hesitation.

Cry out loud, without fear and shame.

Cry as much as you feel is needed.

Thanks for reading!

If you found this worth reading, even a small gesture of support means a lot.

(This story was originally published on Medium.com)