Lately, my dreams have been the most vivid they have been in years. I wake up each morning feeling as if I have just had an entire expedition, adventure, or even tragedy. I can't help but think that the extremes of my dreams correlate to my day by day life.
Last night I had a dream I was on a school bus in a foreign country. I was with people I know; dancers who I studied abroad with and one of my best friends. We were riding on the bus, in what looked like a rural country, dirt roads, ripped flags, abandoned buildings, and we were driving to a beach. The bus driver was a family friend of mine who I have known all my life. This particular family friend is an older man, not married, always there, and always joyful, but not necessarily having anyone by his side. We reached the beach, the passengers got off the bus, but for some reason, the bus driver kept driving the bus into the ocean. Before you knew it, he was a ways out, and all of a sudden, the bus had reached a point in the ocean where the depth dropped and the bus plummeted into the ocean. I swam out with my best friend to tried and save the driver. When I reached the bus, swam down to look in the passengers seat, the driver was there and either sleeping, unconscious, or dead. I reached to touch the pulse on his neck and he woke up abruptly. I swam around to the other side of the bus to open the door and when I looked in again, the driver had vanished. I woke up in this moment.
This dream has been on my mind all day. The most vivid memories are the bus dropping abruptly, and the bus driver vanishing. The look on the driver's face when I first swam down to see him was peaceful. It was almost as if he had driven all the way out there to get away. He had done his job of catering to the passengers, and now it was his time to just... I don't know... leave?
So what does the sinking bus mean? What does the serenity and peace of the bus driver's face and then the vanishing of him altogether have to do with my current life situation? Why was I the one to go save him?
I've researched that sinking in a dream refers to the loss of my confidence and assurance. Seeing someone else sink means I am having a problem and I need help from the outside world to solve or deal with it. It can indicate misery or unsatisfied needs.
To dream that a loved one is vanishing before my eyes insinuates that my own anxiety and insecurities of being alone or not being able to depend on anyone is taking over. The vanishing is a sign that my own self-esteem is low or that I have lost touch with some aspects of myself.
The whole idea of me attempting to rescue this person represents feelings about an urgent need to be spared from neglect, danger, or situations that leave an overwhelming feeling. Being desperate to escape a problem.
It's weird how much these various meanings correlate to my current life state. I'm 24, confused on my path in life, struggling in my relationship, and sometimes feel trapped in the place I'm in. I know that I will reach my goals and achieve the level of success that I have always dreamed of, but am having problems with getting started and feel held back. What I have learned is to follow my body's natural messages. Something is clearly pointing out these problems to me, and If I want to move forward with my career choices, I need to make changes.
Until then, I will continue to research and envision where I truly want to be.