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On Not Drinking Alcohol

What it's like to give up booze

By Jenn TomomitsuPublished 6 years ago 4 min read
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Deciding to give up alcohol can feel like social suicide. Not only does it seem as if everyone around you drinks, but there can be a tendency for people to question your decision and to feel uncomfortable around your abstinence. This isn't always the case of course, but it's something to be prepared for.

Whenever I find myself in social situations where people don’t know me, I often encounter the following conversation: "So you don’t drink at all?" "Could you drink one type of alcohol and not another?" And so on…. this could be likened to being vegan or going on a strange diet. People are curious. Or they might be concerned that just because you don't drink that you're judging them which is not the case. In actuality, I am no stranger to partying, so my reasons for not drinking are not about being straight-edge or purist. Not that there is anything wrong with those reasons either.

I gave up alcohol in 2012 at the age of 36. One might wonder why I quit when I’d already been consuming it on and off for 20 years. The reason is that I am one of those unlucky Asian people who has a genetic intolerance to alcohol. This doesn't mean that I will go into anaphylactic shock if I have a sip of wine. I could actually engage in the odd glass of Prosecco, but it would be with worse consequences than everyone else. I realise there are many red-faced Asians out there who continue to pour beer, whiskey and spirits down their gullets without seeming to care. But for me, as I entered my late 30s, I started to feel awful even after one drink. Sitting at home to enjoy a glass of wine is not something I could do without feeling lousy.

Studies have shown that people who have symptoms of alcohol intolerance are much more vulnerable to its negative effects. Simply put, my inability to break down alcohol means it becomes a poison circulating through my body. So in many ways, it’s actually important for my health that I don’t drink. The red face and flushing I can handle. It’s the uncontrollable rapid heartbeat (which pounds much faster and uncomfortably than caffeine or any other stimulant I’ve ever taken), the itching, skin swelling, difficulty breathing and the sickly morning-after feelings that have become less tolerable over the years. Not only that, but as other people around me feel relaxed and sleepy with alcohol, I become hyper-stimulated due to the rapid heartbeat and flushing. This probably sounds like fun but it's not a pleasant kind of stimulation. And forget sleep—if I have a drink, I will be wide-eyed in bed.

I should say that quitting booze also coincided with a time when I was deselecting things which were no longer good for my physical and spiritual well-being. The past 5 years have been focused around health and creating happiness from within. So I cannot say that alcohol abstinence was an isolated choice. It was part of an overall change of habits which were very much about taking care of myself. For these reasons and more, I don’t regret my decision—in fact I feel so much better for it—and in some ways, it’s been interesting to be an observer of that world, rather than be immersed in it.

All that said, I'll confess that on occasion I do miss the taste of wine and being part of the hilarious, uninhibited times of alcohol with my friends. But I’ve also learned how to have fun with sobriety. And, the more I have learned to love myself, the less I've felt the need to be part of those kinds of experiences. I know what it is to do what’s best for me and not give in to peer pressure just so I can fit in.

So if you also find yourself at a crossroads with alcohol then don’t feel bad about it. Be proud of yourself for taking care of you. Perhaps you’re on a health journey, perhaps you just want to cut back and do it in moderation, or perhaps you even have an intolerance like me. Whatever the case, in the grand scheme of things, what’s important is your integrity towards yourself and being happy. Life’s too short to live on other people’s terms, and there are many ways to have fun without delving into the bottle.

wellness
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About the Creator

Jenn Tomomitsu

Blogger. Taiko drummer. Freelance writer. Lover of words and all things creative. Interests in health, wellbeing, spirituality and culture.

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