Menopause? Could It Be?

For most of my adult life, I questioned and addressed imbalances as they arise, and the more I learn, I have instilled methods to prevent or decrease future episodes. However, I did not see this challenge coming or recognize it for what it was due to one of the most significant emotional challenges that occurred at the same time with the loss of my grandmother in October of 2017. Insomnia itself is a struggle that has afflicted me for over a decade on and off and until recently was managed well through relaxation techniques and focus on the emotional releases to encourage more restful, uninterrupted sleep patterns.

Looking back to ways that I have attempted to manage insomnia have been primarily through guided meditations with brain waves specifically to induce sleep and herbs and supplements that encourage relaxation, such as kava, chamomile, and lavender. During more difficult bouts with insomnia, I have cleared out my bedroom to eliminate clutter, placed salt lamps in my bedroom, burned relaxing essential oils, and avoided my bed until it is time to sleep. I have never turned to conventional medicine to heal or relieve insomnia because I do not agree with taking harmful medications to cover symptoms rather than address and treat the underlying cause. I do not want to be sedated or become a zombie to induce sleep. I prefer to find the imbalance, whether it be in my mind, body, or spirit, and work to restore the balance to eliminate the symptom that appears as insomnia.

Currently, insomnia has made a reappearance and creates a disturbance in my life on all planes when I am unable to restore balance and relief by restful sleep. Last Autumn, I began having difficulty breathing, anxiety in my abdomen, and emotional episodes like nothing I had experienced before. During this time, my grandmother passed unexpectedly and rather suddenly. I could not sleep through one night for months. I assumed it was my reaction to her loss. As the months went by, I noticed the symptoms were especially difficult near the time of my menses. It was through my research and daily personal journal that I learned to understand the changes that were occurring in my body. Understanding what to do and how to accept these changes without disturbance and disconnect from my peace was the most significant challenge.

For me, some of the physical manifestations of insomnia include dark, puffy circles under my eyes, extra-abdominal weight, changes in appetite, and less activity due to fatigue. The mental and emotional manifestations are the most challenging for me with insomnia. They include mental fog and difficulty concentrating, mood swings that range from crying easily to anger and frustrations. My spiritual practice is a huge part of my being and is also compromised during bouts of insomnia and include decreased interest in meditation and relaxation, difficulty during meditation, and disconnect from myself.

Once I realized what was happening, I began to experiment with adjustments in my lifestyle. My diet is vegan, but I still had to analyze the foods and times as well as possible triggers, such as caffeine, alcohol, and sugar. For example, it is suggested to remove caffeine after 4 PM. I have adjusted to having one cup of coffee in the morning and eliminating it the week before my period is due, as that seems to be the time I am most affected. Additionally, deep breathing exercises throughout the day, rather than waiting until it is close to sleep times, can alleviate the difficulty that comes at night.