Life is Harder than Working Out

Currently, I am a personal trainer at Lifetime-Greenwway in Houston, Texas. No, I’m not trying to advertise my services here, but by all means if you feel like you connect with me in some way through my writing and feel like you actually need help in the fitness department and I feel as though I can help you in return then feel free to come see me. I have been training others now for just over five years. It’s been fun and I enjoy it. The only down side is the long days that are spread out, and the constant rescheduling that can occur.

I’ve enjoyed watching all of my clients slowly or quickly improve over months and years. Everyone improves on their own time as motivation and lifes changes comes in waves. With some, it has become more than me being their trainer. I have become their mentor and advisor in relationships, life, and parenting. And I don’t have any children! Yet, my advice seems to be very logical and reasonable to my clients that they choose to ask me for guidance or I just willingly give my perspective and input if they want to use it or not. Of course it’s just advice from my point of view based on what they tell me and what they avoid telling me based on what they perceive themselves. Many clients have told me things they don’t really express to their spouses because the communication is difficult. There’s as much as spouses basically showing they don’t care and don’t communicate properly or choose to not do the work that comes with a relationship, and unfortunately some clients go through as much as physical abuse, which isn’t confessed until much later in fear of judgment staying in such situations regardless of knowing to get out. Human emotion is so powerful and we will do anything or allow ourselves to self destruct in the name of love.

Some days expressing themselves and their difficult and emotional situations are tough as their story can jump around quite a lot trying to piece together the storyline to me. I usually see clients twice a week, so there are things that they have to catch me up on. I can empathize with what they are feeling and what they are kind of going through without them even having to tell me everything. People feel pain and many seem to have emotional trauma in some way from being misunderstood or feeling as if they are not cared for from childhood trauma. You'd be surprised how much our adult relationships are somehow linked to our childhood in some way that we haven't figured out yet. From that, some have been able to open up to me about tough emotional issues going on with them to the point where both of our eyes water and we start crying. I always try to imagine being in the other persons shoes, even though I haven't fully experienced their life. There has been more than a few times I have really needed to hug a client strongly for a solid one or two minutes as they have an anxiety attack or emotional breakdown. There was even one where I held her as she was crying as we both fell to our knees because she basically became limp and I had to drop down to the ground trying to not collapse from her weight almost in shock. People in the gym if they happen to be there at that time are really curious as this isn't what you would typically see from a trainer. These clients are not the majority, as most specifically come to learn how to exercise corretly, to be pushed futher than what they would on their own, or to motivate themselves to get their act togeher as they are now investing money into their health. But with these changes, there is an emotional and mental drive that got them to take those steps in the first place.

These are the people I feel like I’m placed in my career to help. Of course I love helping my clients who don't need my mental councel, but there are those who were meant for me to be in their life disguised as a trainer, even if my presence is temporary in their life. That's just how I feel and it makes my life feel purposful and fullfilled as I actually helped an individual on a deep level. I hope to have at least helped them not feel like they are the only ones who have dealt with deep emotional struggles one cannot seem to shake off. That an outsider could resonate with how they feel as they cannot seem to discuss their issues with the people who they are having problems with. These are the people I get to come across in my workplace and work one on one with. Eventually if it's relevant, I'm also able to help the clients that started their fitness journey just for the superficiality of looking a certain way. I help them become stronger with their emotional and mental health by guiding them in a direction that they can grow from. When you have self worth and true self confidnece, you don't need to seek approval from others. We see this all the time with the amount of likes we get on a picture or how many followers we get.

I originally thought about being a personal trainer in my early twenties as a cool idea, but I didn’t look the part. I had already known that to be successful in that position, it was obvious to look like you knew what you were doing. Being a personal trainer, your body should show the history and work that you invested into yourself in order to match that skill that you are a good trainer because you were able to successfully do it yourself. You are a walking billboard of your knowledge.

That idea was actually marinating in the back of my mind, never taking that goal very seriously for years before I even thought of becoming certified. It was just an idea or dream at that moment. I started my fitness journey just like the majority of young 20 year old females, more like around 24ish from memory. I wanted to look toned and stop gravity from taking over my bottom which was starting to show the signs of looking 40 after 4 years of sitting in college. I was athletic throughout my life, so seeing the change in a negative way from suddenly stopping consistent physical activity for a few years was emotionally depressing for my age at the time. The real motivator that got me to really focus hard everyday on working out correctly, and pushing myself was actually depression and feeling trapped in my life. This time it was not really from my dads passing. Of course that would still affect me for years to come, but instead my depression came from the extreme frustration of my mom’s restaurant I was working at and felt obligated in helping her while I didn't have a concrete knowing of what I wanted to pursue career wise.

Working out became my escape. It was the one thing I did for myself and for no one else. It was the one thing that I could control as life situations that pulled me back always seemed to come to me that i couldn't get out of unless I abandoned my family. I couldn't control the people around me or what life threw at me. But I could control how hard I worked out in the gym and how sore I could make myself feel, as well as control what I chose to eat.