Inspired

When she holds back her tears, it gets stuck in her chest. Her chest feels tight, as her breath feels short. Words come out without depth. Her heart feels hollow, her arteries feel narrow.

Soraya wakes up one morning with indigestions burning her sorrows. She ignores this feeling and tries to rest a little longer. She doesn’t have the energy to face the day. Her desires feel forever fulfilled. Her life is lacking self-love, so she gives up seeking it from lustful eyes.

As she rests her heavy eyes, she remembers those eyes who gave her fake promises, only to break her heart. Walk away from his own lies. She couldn’t handle the truth of her own reality. Instead looking in the mirror without authenticity.

“I’m now 34, and nobody loves me!” she said to herself.

Her posture cripple from inside. Her skin sagged and lacked plump. Dark circles underneath her eyes out of nowhere. She blamed it on not enough rest, even though she sleeps in every day as she feels self-pity.

The sun keeps setting in the evening, and rising the next day, giving her another chance to awaken her light within.

Soraya woke up earlier than normal. She remembered an old friend, Zena wanted to catch up for coffee. She wasn’t looking forward to it. But this friend seemed surprisingly excited to see her after many years ago.

“What will I talk about?” She wondered out loud “We used to go clubbing, but these days I just want to binge on Netflix and popcorn.”

She dressed casually in her loose jeans and t-shirt and walked out the door anyway.

And there she was standing so tall with her floral aqua dress curving around her body. “Well, aren’t you looking lovely? Let’s order coffee.” Zena spoke confidently.

“I’d rather not, my stomach hurts. I’ll just drink water, and possibly some cake.” Soraya responded doubtfully.

“Your stomach hurts?” Her friend asked openly. Without judging her choices, she sat her down and asked openly very deep questions like:

“How long have you felt this…and food makes it worst…what feelings come up…have you seen a specialist?”

Soraya couldn’t answer any of her questions. She really didn’t want to make a big deal out of a stomach-ache. She has gotten so used to having pain in her body.

Zena however, had a special caring way of asking questions. Even if they couldn’t be answered, it didn’t matter. No one has shown her this much care for a long time. She didn’t feel judged for the very first time. She allowed the conversation to flow and she felt very comfortable.

“Zena, I feel so great talking to you. I haven’t felt this great for, gosh I can’t remember how long. I feel like a teenager with butterflies in my stomach. But I don’t have a crush on anyone right now. Why do I have these butterfly feelings?” she opened up her feelings for the very first time.

Zena closed her eyes and put her hand on her own chest “It’s called unconditional love. Love is an energy; it has sparked inside you. It needs to be released.” She spoke softly.

“Well, how do I release it? Do I need to go to the doctor?” Soraya questioned.

Zena calmed her down, and started to explain her transformational life’s story. “those days that we used to go clubbing and not sleep for days, I was at the lowest moments of my time. My parents were very distant and sometimes abusive. I didn’t know why, until I started meditation.” She opened up.

She continued her story whilst they both walked to the park. They found a quiet spot to sit on the ground.

Zena explained meditation “Magic pills won’t solve your pain and suffering. Meditation is the key to your heart. It will give you answers to how and when this pain manifested in your physical body. The healing happens as you reach the level of acceptance and release it through forgiveness. And continue evolving through self-love. Are you ready?”

This was a very significant moment for Soraya’s life. She was finally about to have a breakthrough. Free from pain; instead, transform her well-being and her life. She felt very nervous and hesitant. Then she remembered the butterfly feeling. She desired to have that feeling more often, instead of constant tiredness.

Her meditation took on a very long and deep journey. As she was watching scenarios of her life from above. It was an out of body experience. She saw a glimpse of herself as a young child. She was feeling unworthy. Although no one tried to impose this feeling towards her. She created it herself. And that’s when her posture started to weaken.

This was just the beginning…

Another moment as a teenager; she blindly fell head over heels over some random guy, who was not compatible with her at all. Really, he wasn’t worth her time. But somehow, she created a false fantasy of them being together. A lot of miscommunication and drunk talks. He really wasn’t worth waking up to. But she only realized this during her meditation.

This love energy became trapped inside her heart. All those years of a tight chest, heart-burns, and short breath started from those early memories. She couldn’t feel love within. How could this go on?

She finally opened her eyes and took her first howl of deep breath.

“I see…”

As the days went by, Soraya continued her meditation. It wasn’t easy to begin with. Every time she had a realization; pain and blockages deep within evaporated like steam releasing. She pushed through to reach acceptance and forgiveness. She was doing healing work from the inside out.

When she opened her eyes she repeated “I am love, I am love, I am love”.

She started to notice feeling lighter and brighter every day. Her skin started glowing, her hair stopped falling. She stretched her body and walked straight, like she was being pulled down from underneath the earth and lifted up from the stars.

She transformed her home, cleaned up the cobwebs, and allowed light to enter from the windows. “Geez, I didn’t realize what a nice view I have up here.” She spoke to herself.

Her wardrobe added some sparkle of light and bright colors.

Her dining table and open kitchen got musical with fruits and friendly guests visiting often.

She was a new light being living everyday with full of love.