Create Your Happiness - Bringing Characters to Life

“All great things must first wear terrifying and monstrous masks in order to inscribe themselves on the hearts of humanity,” – Friedrich Nietzsche

Whilst I don’t necessarily believe Friedrich Nietzsche made that quote about costumes, there is a certain truth about how we sometimes must brandish ourselves in interesting and sometimes surreal ways to present our true selves to the world.

My hobby is character creation. Perhaps my lack of ability in making interpersonal relationships inspires me to pursue this, to create characters that I would want to befriend or oppose, but I find it to be an entertaining exercise, nonetheless. The act of inventing, developing, and exploring the protagonist, antagonist, and everything in between. To conceive their backstories, to illustrate them, and, should I take a shine to them, construct the costumes relevant to them.

I am the kind of creative person who sometimes sees my overactive imagination as both a blessing and a curse. Give me a description, and I can have a picture depicting what you requested in very little time. Offer me a subject and the room to come up with ideas, and I will no doubt expand upon them. However, should you ask me to describe or illustrate myself, I suddenly lose the ability to do so. We can be so imaginative and creative, and yet find it impossible to make ourselves the subject and be compelling. Designing costumes seems to be a way around this.

I am part of a fandom where cosplay is a prominent element. We create these characters in writing, in art, and then in fabric and material. The question is, why do we do this? If it is implicit that all of us have one of these characters, why do I and my fellow character creators go so far as to bring ourselves to madness and exhaustion with all the cutting, sewing, and gluing to physical embody them? Certainly, the characters I have, a lycanthrope and a goat, could lend themselves to being simply a matter of prosthesis or make up to achieve the same effect; Giovanni could be accomplished with contacts and fangs, whilst Gideon could just as easily be written off as a satyr or faun, and then portrayed with some false facial hair, horns, and ears, so why go to through the trouble of making something more? Perhaps I should introduce you to the family and you’ll see.

“Who’s afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?” – Three Little Pigs

Firstly, let’s talk about Giovanni Magnus. He is both the first character of my design that I came to use as an avatar, and the first to be portrayed as a costume. The version you see is model number four. In terms of design, he is the most materially involved. The character revolves a terrific deal around the aspects of the physical; he is physical strong, enduring, and powerful, his appearance immediately conjures the thought of the infamous “big bad wolf” from many a fairy tale and human legend, and, most notably, he has a unique power. Giovanni Magnus can draw on the fears of others, and turns that energy into his strength, be it physical feats of unmatched power or through unrestrained magic. Naturally, to convey such an imposing character, this entails a more complete costume.

Giovanni has the most parts constructed; his ensemble includes the head, tail, feel, paws, torso, sleeves, leggings, armour, and a quarterstaff made from crafting foam, pipe insulation, and broom handles – all constructed by hands. The sheer bulk of physical props associated with him are, in my opinion, necessary to convey the feeling of him. Why go to all the effort? If lycanthropes are natural shape-shifters, why require more than fangs, red contacts, and maybe pointed ears to achieve the desired effect? Simple. Giovanni embodies a sense of justice, moral character, and, above all, compassion. These are things we see as being strength, impressive and proud. A character such as that demands a domineering physical presence to truly capture these things. Through his performance, I convey these things to others who wish to interact with him, the dichotomy of his being, that which is symbolic of what we fear, but simultaneously disarming due to his quite sweet and soft facial expressions.

A lot of people don’t see these invisible virtues as strength, simply because it’s not immediately tangible. These are things that I consider to be strengths for myself; I feel keenly the pain of others and want to challenge that which causes them anguish, not unlike Giovanni who feels fear so keenly and is empowered by it. Some label it “oversensitive”, I name it compassionate, and that’s why I have Giovanni, the strong body to match the equally strong heart. Constructed from foam and fur, cut following templates I had found online, Giovanni has allowed me to bring out the side of me that often draws derision in a world that has no heart.

“Look carefully at the goat sitting on the edge of the cliff: Everything that shows you the peace of being fearless is a great teacher for you! The goat is a teacher for you, respect him!” – Mehmet Murat ildan

Quite what inspired Gideon Klaus varies from time to time, from just being a token villain to a secretive desire to play the villain. Gideon is a more cerebral entity than Giovanni, not to the say the latter is by any means not clever, but Gideon heralds himself as a genius without peer. His inventions push boundaries, scientific and moral, and he isn’t afraid to get his hands dirty whilst doing so. Again, I try to capture this in costume as best I can but being minimalist my strategy. Look at his expression; what do you see? Do you see anger, frustration, disgust, confusion, determination, pensiveness, a furrowed brow deep in thought, or just RBF like you wouldn’t believe? Perhaps he is a nod to the character Spock, famous for his slanted eyebrows, unwavering stoic expression, and pointed ears, who hails from a race of logicians?

His attire too is incredibly variable; I have a wardrobe of clothing just for him. There is his usual suit and tie clothing, his military jacket for combative situations, his laboratory coat complete with a brain in a jar with googly eyes on it, and even a tacky tourist outfit that seems so at odds with his normally strict appearance, and yet seems to work so well with it. I put a lot of thought into it. But, like I have said before, I could so easily have just made Gideon a satyr rather than a goat; a few bits of detachable facial hair, horns, hooves, and goat ears would do what is necessary. And yet, I make the full outfit. Why make such an effort?

Gideon can be antagonistic. He has the kind of ego that says that if something is worth doing, it should be done. Granted, I don’t have the means to fully explore his malicious curiosity and inventiveness, but I have enough for simple mischief, and for that he is perfect. You wouldn’t expect a grumpy old goat to have a sense of humour, yet Gideon brings out my inner prankster, that little bit of chaos in the world, one seemingly bored and tired of too many would be villains trying their hand and now wanting to show them how it’s done. His first outing, if I recall correctly, ended with a picture of him peering from behind a telephone booth, having managed to stuff a few people inside. Why? Science! One of my last conventions with him before lock down ended with him gathering the infinity stones and then snapping his fingers, which was then followed up by news of the next year’s theme being a world where humanity disappeared and the animals took over. Not saying Gideon caused the apocalypse, but it’s a massive coincidence.

There is something so enjoyable about being the villain sometimes, and Gideon allows me to be just that in small ways. The catharsis is a strong part of it, and I almost feel one cannot embody that little bit of disorder without a mask to become that character. He endears folk with his hi-jinks and seemingly sophisticated appearance, only to test their trust with some elaborate ploy. I don’t feel emboldened enough to be the devil on the shoulder alone, which is a shame because sometimes we do need them to push us to make a decision that would make them happy, but Gideon allows me to express that little bit of cheek and cranky that I all too often feel too worried to explore. Whilst the base was bought from a small-time maker, the fur that I have cut, the horns I made, and the personality that shines through is all my own.

“My little koala type bear

Little koala type bear

I can see you sitting there

With your silent smile.” -Paul McCartney

Now Dennis is a special case. Dennis came into being as a mood board for which I project all that I feel positive about myself after going through a depressive period in my life. After a diagnosis of being on the autistic spectrum, I came to question myself and who I was, and was at a loss for answers on my own. Dennis was who I made to remedy that. His insatiable appetite, his love of nerdy culture, his simple joys, his physical traits, these were all things about myself that I knew to be genuine after the diagnosis broke me down in such a clinical way. Koalas are simple animals, but that’s what was needed in the moment, a reminder of the simplest of things when I life had become overly complicated. But if all I need was to be reminded of what I had to feel good about myself, why make a costume of them as well?

In my mind, bringing Dennis to life wasn’t just my creative passion, nor just another project, it was a way of healing. By making Dennis, I took things that were often considered traits of autism, fixation, precision, obsession with perfection, and put them to use. With every cut, stitch, and blob of glue, I solidify the feelings I had about myself. I not only turn my traits, the things so coldly laid bare in the diagnostic letter, into something productive, but now I have a costume of a character who is everything I have come to love about myself given form. It’s still a while before meets and physical events return, but when they do, Dennis will be there, being all that makes me happy and maybe bringing joy to others. Of all the costumes I have created, he is that which I am most proud of. He is simple, but that makes him extraordinary.

There is an honest simplicity to him. There are very visible flaws, the fur doesn’t quite work, and despite all the trimming the hair never seems to look neat. But that’s a good thing – if we made it all perfect, it wouldn’t be. He can be combined with any outfit of my choosing, the nerdy t-shirts that are my favourites, and requires a lot less work to put together than my other characters. But easily what makes him favourable is that he conveys personality that is distinct to me. He isn’t just a character I cosplay; he is me. He is my positivity given form.

Why go to all this effort to create material costumes? These characters have stories to tell and are part of our own. By bringing them to life, by toiling with sewing machines, needles, and scissors, we share them with others. By portraying them, we create new stories, not only of how they react to the world around them, but of the interactions people have with them. There are stories to their creation, there are stories to their being, and stories where someone met them. It is through them those of us who have difficulty being ourselves or showing the best of what we have to offer can do so. Through Giovanni, I show strength and try to be the bold person I could be; through Gideon, I show creativity and indulge myself in that little bit of inventive chaos; through Dennis, I wear my positivity and hope it inspires others. It’s an unusual irony, where we often take on new faces to show who we truly are.

And that’s where I am. Many metres of fabric, yards of thread, several lost and broken needles, and the same “Faithful” pair of scissors throughout later, and I have brought my characters to life. I’ve seen people take this line of work and make very lucrative businesses from costume making and found them inspiring, but to me it’s just a hobby. For me, it’s not simply showing off my talents in character building, both materially and on paper, it’s about showing the spark that is me.