Why I Miss Waitressing and Why I'm Not Going Back

I retired from waitressing last year on my 50th birthday. It was my present to myself. I was overjoyed. I know that people were talking about how long it would be before I came back because it wasn't the first time I'd quit. But I was determined that this time I would not be back.

A few days ago, I was at my old restaurant and my boss said, "Dani, if there was ever a time you were thinking about coming back, this would be it."

Staff are heading back to college (or starting college) in the fall and our area of the world has opened up enough that restaurants can open at full capacity again. She needs staff.

I'm not going to lie. I did think about it. For a couple days.

Here's why I considered going back to work at the restaurant

1. I miss my customers. I live in a small town and many of our customers (I always think of them as mine) are local and regular. If it wasn't busy, it wasn't uncommon for servers to stop and have a chat. Some customers I loved more than other. In particular, those cute little old couples. I love older couples that so obviously love each other and tease each other. Just adorable.

2. I miss the money. Don't get me wrong. In the year since I went to writing full-time, I have been able to build up my income to be more than what I earned at the restaurant. But I have to wait to get paid. Sometimes until the end of the month. Sometimes there's payment issues. It can be annoying and hard to manage a budget like that. But when you're serving, you walk out with cash money everyday. Sometimes it's a lot. And I miss knowing that on my next shift I will have more cash for whatever I need to spend it on.

3. I miss the hustle. Sure, some days were hard but when I was in a groove, handling the hell out of my six tables, doing 10 things at a time, running around and killing it with my work bestie - I felt like I was a rock star. When I was handling my own shit and helping other staff I felt invincible.

Why I decided not to go back

Like I said, I seriously considered it. Ultimately though, I know that going back would be a mistake for me. I don't need the money and I know that in 6 months I wouldn't be happy.

Here's why I'm not going back:

1. I can support myself with writing income. I'm not where I want to be yet but I'm getting there. I see my monthly income growing and I've got some great opportunities in front of me. I'd have to give some of those up. And I wouldn't be able to keep up to my freelance work, even if I went back part-time. I don't want to give up all that I've worked for.

2. Freedom. When you work for yourself you have a kind of freedom that you can never get working for someone else. You can't just decide to take a trip. You can't decide when you're ready for a day off. You have to book off time and ask for permission. And even if you book off time, it might not be granted. I've been told that I can't take time off at a certain time because someone else had already booked it off and both of us being gone would mean that they'd be short staffed.

3. Call ins. No matter how much I try to avoid it, there would be times when someone else called in sick or didn't show up for work. Everyone is likely to be called if they are not working. Some people seem to be better at saying, "No, I have plans." I'm not good at that. I know I'd go in. Especiallly if it was my boss asking me to come in.

4. Schedule. I know it is hard to schedule all the staff and keep everyone happy. I couldn't possibly make that work though and still manage my writing and my freelance business if I didn't have the same shifts every week. I tried to work that out in the past. It never stuck though. I'd ask for specific shifts and end up losing them to someone else when they came back to work. Or even just decided they wanted the shifts I had. I know. Not fair. In the end, it would just drive me crazy that I couldn't have the shifts that I signed up for. I knew I wasn't the only person that worked there though. It was my problem though. Not the business's problem.

In the end, I know that I wouldn't be happy. I'd start wishing that I'd stuck with the writing, building my business, and doing what makes me happy. I'm there now. I'm growing my business. Why change that?

So yes, I miss waitressing and I miss the people. But I'm not going back. I'm making this choice for me. I'm doing what is best for my future.

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