The False Dichotomy of Work/Life Balance

Those that regularly talk about work life balance are, I believe, doing so with the best of intentions and with worthy objectives in mind. However, using the term and concept in the way we do puts us in a box from which there is no possible escape. Work/life balance implies and requires that the two things be in opposition to each other. If they were not why would we need to balance them. By setting up the two things, ‘work’ and ‘life’, as opponents we immediately eliminate from consideration a huge number of potential options to improve the situation. Rather than finding solutions based on accommodation or compromise, setting up work and life as opponents, as enemies, pushes us toward confrontational and non-constructive solutions. It makes it appear as if solutions that are a net gain for the one thing must, by there very nature, be a net loss for the other, and in the end, everybody loses no matter which way the pendulum swings. It does not have to be this way, and it should not be this way. It is time to call a cease fire in the work/life war. Work and life are not disparate, separate things, or at least they should not be. The more one can integrate work into life and life into work the better it is for everyone. Eventually the word work disappears and it just becomes life. The life you live for free, and the one you get paid for. Neither is more valuable than the other, and they can and should ‘work’ together to bring each of us the things we are seeking from life, whether that be material pleasures, intellectual pursuits, families, or any and all of the above. If we want capitalism to survive and thrive, if we truly believe it is the right approach for optimizing all of our chances at economic and personal well being, we must end the war between work and life. There is no other way. Of course, this is a very easy thing to say, much harder to actually execute on a plan to accomplish.

I do not have the solution, but I one thing that seems clear is that it will require a reframing of everyone's perspective as to what constitutes 'work' and what does not. It will also require that we put to bed (pun intended) this silly notion that longer hours at 'work' indicates that a person is more dedicated or better at their job than another person who does not spend as much time at 'work.' I have definitely put this notion into practice in my own life when I have been put in the position of making hiring decisions. In fact, anyone I have ever interviewed who told me a story of sleeping at work (only 2 have) because they put in so many hours, I immediately put in the no pile. It tells me nothing except that they have terrible time management skills. Working longer hours does not equal better/more successful employees, in fact, more often than not it indicates the exact opposite. I look for people who have succeeded at work not by working longer hours, but by working smarter, and integrating their home/work lives in clever ways. If you don’t have time to go home, you are failing to work smart, failing to delegate appropriately (if you say no one else can do the job you are failing at training), failing your family and self, and failing to get the job done in a timely manner. Basically you are a failure. Go home. Spend time with your family, or take a shower and solve a work problem while you bathe. Works for me. lol!