Memories: 27 August 2023

27 August 2023

A lovely day. I am still exhausted from the dancing on Friday night/Saturday morning. But I just took Charley for our regular walk around the block.

27 August 2022

I need to write a manifesto for code of conduct at my infamous dancing spot.

1. wear underwear....specifically pants.

2.bdsm fetishes are to be reserved for home or your local bdsm club.

3. trust no one.

4.play better dj music....that hip hop or house for hours pisses me off and clears the dance floor.

5 start a training room for the lacklustre inadequate men that have been leering uselessly for 11 fucking years....if they have any nouse left after ceding the rest of their vapid personalities with YOU KNOW WHAT!

It could be like a charm school but for men to learn basic etiquette and culturally appropriate flirting etc.....oh never mind…I sound like a fascist.

Just wear your goddamn knickers and stop with the lesbian rape fantasies in my spot. ie fuck off outta my face and get a room for that. Those women last night were nauseating.

Also…Reasons for not wearing panties...you shat yourself on the way to the venue so you had to throw them in the bin and wash

2. you urinated on yourself and had to wash

3. your dog ate them

4 its midsummer and it is too hot....so wear a longer skirt

5 you slept over at a friend’s place and the faeries stole your cottontails....(not very likely) but I am rationalsing for irrational perverted people

please tell me they washed....the bo can be eyewatering in there…and its not quite spring yet.

oh I know....the venue or someone should supply those paper pants you get when you have a wonderful colonoscopy. Just throw them at the primevil cow ....but it’s not even her I am mad at, but the asian fiend who sought to expose her genitals like that....I mean really??? Gross!!!

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27 August 2021

27 August 2020

1:11pm Thank you to my Angels, Earthly and Etheric.

Blessings to and from the Multiverses in an ever evolving Torus Field of energy.

Love, Light, Truth and Happiness.

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27 August 2019

At my hairdressers. I had a panic attack as I left the money for the hairdressing in the stupid machine at Woolies, because I got flustered with the machine and my ex friend who works there had to fix something with the machine. No word spoken between us, just her smug face.

So I walked out without my cash (like a dickhead!) and did not remember I had not taken my cash out until I got to my Hairdresser’s place.

So then I was frantically calling Woolies. Eventually after about 6 calls (Jesus!!!) I spoke to someone who said their employee had found the money still in the machine and handed it in.

Omggg. I said “Thank you for your honesty”. So now I have to go back to fetch the moolah and drop it back to my lovely Kylie.

I ate my own liver, worrying the next customer in the self service machine might have stolen the money. But all good. Phew!

Update 2020: Oddly on Tuesday I left behind two vanilla slices I was going to Share with my hairdresser for morning tea (but thankfully grabbed my money out of the machine!). What is it about August and all the mad mistakes I make?!

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27 August 2018

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27 August 2017

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My gorgeous (and clever!) cousin Robert Phillips who is the family historian messaged me this morning to inform me there is a discrepancy on my husband's family tree.

I was gifted 20 pages of family history on the Arons family by another gorgeous and generous cousin Maris G. Rabolini several years ago.

So now it seems the ancestors want me to get off my butt and input the data onto Ancestry. It is long overdue.

I have no working laptop at the moment but I shall begin and do what I can on my iPhone. It will keep me out of mischief for a while and hopefully it will appease the spirits of the ancestors (I still have several family curses to break (dammit!) and also will enable other relatives to compare data, kvetch and moan about anomalies and missing data and also find each other. Lol!

The gods must be crazy but here we go again. Down the rabbit hole.

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Bloody hell. Half of the Wellington Jewish community are probably related to my girls. So many names and all hailing from Baranovicze, Poland.

It's been a busy day putting all that data onto Ancestry. I can't see straight from staring at my iPhone screen and concentrating. But it will be great to have us all on there. Our little contribution to eternity.

The Dead are Dancing and the living are memorialising and most of that family treated me like shit but I kept some nice memories of my former husband's cousins who were very kind to me and of my sweet father in law who thought I was awesome and that got me through all the dry stolid facts.

It has made me feel like going back to Wellington for a visit but no money. Anyway only Lynne would be happy to see me after all these years. The wind still blows from the south and the scenery of my childhood would be there but the cityscape has changed.

I would be a stranger in my own birthplace. A lost alien looking for hallmarks of history. Not inclined to put myself through that even if I did have the cash.

No, my place is here in the hills of Holland Park, dreaming the dream and making the best of what is left of my life.

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Tell me what you are good at!

Not dying when any sensible person should have/would have.

Tell me what you love?

Life on earth, magick, mystery. Love.

Tell me who you loved?

Lol! Really?! Hahaha

Tell me why you loved them?

I felt inspired, or tantalised, or safe, or excited. I felt Alive. I felt Wanted.

Tell me why you loved them when they proved themselves False Mirages of pain?

I was still addicted to the drug called Hope and my own foolish vanity that I deserved better or more or even just struggled to regain my balance after dancing on the hair of a timeless whiskered god called Truth.

It hurts but it never lets me fall for long. Something or someone always catches me and raises me up again.

Tell me what you want right now?

A hug and ten million dollars. Ok I will settle for a kiss of bliss. No more blitzkrieg curses from Ancient enemies and to live my life out in harmony and joy.

Tell me what is yours?

My flesh, my heart. A few trinkets I was gifted or fought for. My breath. My mind is not mine. It was loaned to me. My spirit is not mine either. But by G-d it drives this shell like a maniacal henchman to what purpose?

A joke. A laugh. An example of bitterness, sugar-coated in the sweet stench of denial. A laugh. Let's keep the humour. It is the only thing the angels comprehend.

Tell me what you have given to others?

Life, death, fear, loathing, but also integrity, deep abiding Love (to the point of insanity), admiration, hope, laughter. Strength.

If I gave you ten million dollars what would you be?

The Tanya, only richer, financially secure and whimsical.

What if you never get enough money to survive into older age? I mean bare bones?

I will survive or I will get off this carousel. What is money but a yearning for power which ultimately absolutely corrupts.

What would you give up to have wealth?

Nothing. I should not have to sell myself like the Whore of Babylon to survive, and neither should anyone else. Greed and vanity begets such putrid abasements as Trump.

I have and am everything I need, by the grace of G-d and the people who have helped provide for me.

What is your legacy?

My heart will go on. My children. The few rare individuals who will remember me with a smile.

27 August 2015

I have been thoroughly spoilt by my beautiful friends. Tonight bags of groceries arrived from Sally. 3 blocks of chocolate, a big container of croissants, yummy raspberries, passion fruits, yoghurt, 2 quiches, lovely gourmet bread and of course pussy cat food and litter. Also vegetables. This is not the first time she has sent me a huge pamper package. Thanks, Sally!

Jarrod also spoiled me with red wine and Julie also fussed over me yesterday. Lyn also constantly keeps me in good company, bread and lately vegetables from the Food Bank.

Also not just goodies, but I have been shown so much love and care from all my online friends too.

Thank you all so much for your love and support. I appreciate everything you do for me!

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What would you do if you were not afraid???

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27 August 2014

3.16 am. In bed with Penny. I have cooked myself dinner, watched tv (not much worth watching), while I continued painting the old suitcases. They are coming up nicely. I also tidied up my cramped laundry although I still need to scrub out the bar fridge and start filling it with drinks now that spring is on the way!

Time to schluff now. I have a debrief appt with my psychiatrist tomorrow afternoon. I always look forward to that :-).

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Holy Crap!!! 3.36pm. Just woke up and missed my 3 pm appointment. Not travelling well to do that.

I really needed to see him too. Now on cancellation list!

I had to bomb myself out to get any sleep so that is annoying. The weather is shitty outside too!

27 August 2013

I woke up at 2.30pm. spent the remains of the day in the garden, changing the water in the fishponds, watering, chopped down a banana tree for it's almost ripening bananas, then cut the tree up and put in my compost.

My heart is aching from the loss of Bella so I kept myself busy.

27 August 2011

All I have to say is this: The Bitch is Back and I'm too embarrassed to say why, but (school girlish giggles and quasi-post analysis hysteria) I'm so proud and impressed with myself right now, I could just POP! (And remember darlings, I don't POP for every man I see!)

27 August 2010

Now officially sick with asthma. Gail blamed my mould cleaning activity two nights ago, but to be fair I've been brewing a good solid chest infection for a few days, so it probably started before that. Gail is right though, I should wear a mask when I do these mad nocturnal jobs, like gardening, potting plants and mould cleaning. OY!

Sylvia Shine: you know what you should do,then be a mench,and do it,or maybe,you like to punish yourself,so you are a big girl,GROW UP x x x x x x

Me: Sylvia, I grew up a long long time ago...I'm waiting for everyone to catch up with me. But yeah I have major problems with selfcare, which is a byproduct of my shitty childhood. Now the rotters are dead or missing in action LOL, I guess I can wholeheartedly agree with you that I need to preserve my health for as long as possible but one wonders, to what end?

Suicide by too much mould inhalation or the weird little microorganisms in Potting mix does seem to be a rather pathetic and ignoble death. I guess if I really wanted to die, I'd do something much more intentional LOL

Don't worry I love my life, and I intend to walk hand in hand with myself till the end when I finally lose contact with my physical body. Philosophising aside, we are all temporary anyway so I intend to enjoy the remainder of my sojourn here.

Sylvia Shine: just keep going strong, good on ya x x x x x x x x

27 August 2009

I am so happy and proud of Crystal's performance as Polly in The Threepenny Opera. She was awesome and the play was fantastic.

27 August 2008

is satiated after a lovely dinner....rubs oversized tummy for luck.

Copyright Tanya Désirée Arons