Making art during the end of the world

I always say that the world ended in March of 2020. It is a joke, as we are obviously all still here, but it was my way of cheering myself up when it did seem like the world was ending. “It took less than a week,” I would joke with my mom. “Thursday I was in class, Saturday I was at work, and by Monday the world had ended.”

Lockdown will have an impact on us for a while. There are baby’s who were born during a time when people did not go outside. Little kids had to be told they couldn’t see their families or friends because of a virus that no one knew much about. It was and still is a scary thought.

I have always been an extroverted introvert, or maybe an introverted extrovert. I am loud, friendly, and when I am out of my house the life of the party. The problem is that I would often rather be curled up on the couch watching a movie or reading a book. So at first when we were told we were getting an extra week of spring break I was excited. Two weeks without any schoolwork to do. If I just ignored the impending doom of a virus that had overtaken the country I could try and relax.

That didn’t work out.

Less than a week later and I was going crazy. I had watched too much tv, I felt like my brain was melting. I needed something to do. I found that in a needle and some thread. I had never considered embroidery to be something that would peak my interest. My first thought was always that it was a grandma activity. I found a kit on Amazon one day when I had actually typed “hobbies” into the search bar. I soon found that I loved it.

I wasn’t immediately great at it. There are a lot of stitches that I would watch videos on Youtube to try and learn, but still have it come out not quite right. It was time consuming, which was also not something I would normally want to do. It took me a while, but eventually I finished my first hoop. I was so proud. It wasn’t perfect but it was still something I had made.

I ordered more kits and worked on different stitches. I made one for my mom and my grandma. My proudest moment was when my grandma opened hers for Christmas and couldn’t believe that I had made it. She was probably just being nice, but the pride on her face as she stared at it still stuck with me. It’s hung in her apartment now for everyone to see.

I don’t often stick with things. I take up hobbies and ditch them just as fast. The only one that had ever really stuck was writing, and I ended up making that my career choice. Embroidery stuck with me even after the lockdown ended. I would come home from work and play netflix in the background as I stitched. I made tote bags and started drawing up my own patterns. I ordered huge things of thread and extra needles. My fingers would hurt from pricks and holding the thin, metal needles, but I loved it.

Watching the colorful thread become flowers of all sorts, or stitching pretty, delicate words of encouragement made me feel happy even as the world around me seemed to burn. I could turn my brain off and only focus on what I was going to create. I have always been a creative person, but never an artistic one. I can’t draw or paint, but I could stitch and that made me very happy.