Wit
Sorry, Friend. Runner-Up in Sorry About That Challenge. Top Story - April 2026.
I'm sorry. I want you to know I sincerely mean that. I can't imagine what you must be feeling at this moment. In my defense, I have to say, I never signed up for this. I got your message 3 days after you'd already left, with the excuse that you had to leave quickly and had just found the time to call. “Just check on the place a few times, please! I'll be back in a week. Thanks for being such a good friend!” (Translation: If you're a good friend you won't mind.)
By Dana Crandell6 months ago in Humor
Miami Beach and the Great Fabric Shortage: A Thong Gone Too Far?
FABRIC SCARCITY IN THE SUNSHINE STATE In a world where jeans once reigned supreme and “coverage” meant something, the state of Florida is having a thread famine. Places like Miami Beach decided to flip the script and the waistband. Somewhere between Key West boat ramps and the wild vortex known as Haulover Inlet, humanity is collectively experiencing “inattentional blindness” to fabric.
By The Pompous Post6 months ago in Humor
Jerald's Custom Order. Runner-Up in Sorry About That Challenge.
“Thank you for calling Angel Food’s Devil Cake Bakery. Our hours of operation are Monday through Friday 6am until 3pm and Saturday and Sunday 8am until 2pm. For information on our delicious homemade breads, cakes, and other goods press 1. To place an order for a custom cake press 2…”
By Amos Glade6 months ago in Humor
DATING APPS – THE USED CAR LOT OF LOVE (NOW WITH MORE MILEAGE AND LESS HOPE)
WELCOME TO THE DIGITAL AUTO MALL OF DESPAIR Welcome to modern romance, where love is no longer found in smoky bars or awkward setups from your aunt. It’s parked on a virtual lot next to a thousand other vehicles, all shouting: “Low mileage! Great paint job! Serious inquiries only!”
By The Pompous Post6 months ago in Humor
Why My Underwear Is on Your Radiator: A Sincere Apology. Runner-Up in Sorry About That Challenge.
Please accept my sincerest apology for my underwear on your radiator, I know we’ve never met. But when the door was opened at seven in the evening, you were occupied with your friend, the trash, and the dog. It was the only thing I could leave behind before our unprecedented introduction could occur.
By Caitlin Charlton6 months ago in Humor
Survival of the Wittiest: Was Human Language Driven by Humour?
According to a daring new study that was published in PNAS Nexus, human language evolution was motivated by wit rather than just the necessity to survive. Ljiljana Progovac, a linguist at Wayne State University, suggests that sexual selection actively favoured quick-wittedness, or the capacity to connect words in smart, humorous ways. It's possible that our predecessors joked their way into sophisticated language.
By Francis Dami6 months ago in Humor
The Housing Market is on Fire... Literally. Rent Comes with Free Marshmallows Now.
Welcome, You Brave Homeless Souls Congratulations, reader. If you’re viewing this newsletter, it means you can still afford Wi-Fi… Cherish that… Because according to Zillow, the average rent for a one-bedroom apartment is now an arm and a leg, one functioning kidney, a vial of dragon’s blood, and three Funko Pops from 2018.
By The Pompous Post6 months ago in Humor
The Miss Gloria Hour: Is Taylor Swift Really Her Guest This Week?
“Trixie! What’s going on? Why are you calling me at three in the morning? I’ve gotta be up early. We have a big day.” “I am so sorry, Jason. I just received a phone call from Debbie. She's at Cedar Sinai. She tried calling you twice but you didn’t answer. She left you a few voicemails. Gloria is in the hospital.”
By Rick Henry Christopher 6 months ago in Humor
