#100 Things in 20 Minutes II: The Reckoning

Brought to you by the author of "Obscenity on the Walls," and in partnership with Dawn dish-soap (it's good for ducks), as well as 1001 other tragicomic sponsors with both kinds of masks;

Presenting:

[In the same place! with the same coffee-mug! with the same goddamn dog yipping in the apartment next door!]

#100 THINGS IN 20 MINUTES II: THE RECKONING

on your mark

get set

go!!!

1. That dog again
2. Will it never
3. Other Thoughts
4. It actually just stopped
5. 4 thoughts of dog in 1
6. dog=god
7. they were wrong, it's not a trinity it's a quadrinity
8. we create the world with our thoughts
9. we create our thoughts with our words
10. therefore wordworld?
11. topsy-turvy
12. so tired
13. it hurts makes for
14. a world of tired
15. and world of hurt
16. ergo sum
17. therefore I am
18. same thought thrice
19. that's cheating
20. I admit it
21. but i had to think it
22. therefore I am
23. at least I exist
24. and you exist
25. what a comfort?
26. Good Start now
27. Other thoughts follow
28. Pep
29. Zeal, even in spectral disorder
30. the same black coffee mug
31. is a different thought
32. and reflecting upon that different thought
33. is also a different thought
34. My cat is helping me with my spectral disorders
35. Her name is Livia Messalina Augusta
36. Part tabby
37. Part ginger
38. Part calico
39. she is strange-looking
40. but beautiful
41. Livia Drusilla Augusta and
42. {Something} Messalina Augusta
43. are 2 Roman Empresses
44. She gets her name from
45. Livia Drusilla Augusta was known for her cunning and state-craft
46. Messalina was known for her wild sex orgies
47. Livia's Husband was Augustus Caesar
48. They both divorced their previous spouses to marry each other
49. Augustus who was Octavian slept with Julius Caesar as a boy, in order to get his fortune
50. according to Mark Antony [it worked]
51. Messalina, wife of Claudius Caesar used to have "contests"
52. Against seasoned prostitutes at drunken orgies
53. and often won!
54. both very different characters
55. and neither of them like my Cat
56. Orange stripes on tabby
57. Absinthe pastilles from Italy
58. It's candy on the desk
59. Livia Drusilla Augusta was deified officially by the Roman State
60. as the DIVA.LIVIA.AVGVSTA
61. theoretically her deified spirit could be living in my Cat
62. Just kidding.
63. She's fixed so she's not much like Messalina
64. I do not know Messalina's first name
65. she was not officially deified by the Roman State
66. Shame, such epic orgies she held
67. This time, I might make 100
68. Might
69. (That's cheating)
70. Mind went blank after all that Roman debauchery
71. And a work's day
72. I mean a day's work
73. Never mind
74. Almosting it...
75. The Reckoning!
76. The chilling and meaningless climax of
77. the multifariously entertaining wiles of
78. unconvincingly scheming to
79. (It's all coming apart now)
80. Doesn't matter, keep going!
81. On second thought
82. now that i think of it
83. it's not a crime to think it
84. thoughts are like roses
85. not a dime a dozen
86. Time is nearing,
87. but our stalwart heroes
88. still have a chance
89. of defeating the bad guys
90. of finding true love
91. of drifting off to sleep peacefully at night
92. in improv that goes on
93. and on
94. bearing the mere structural vestiges of the narrative experience
95. Onward ho, I might exceed 100 thoughts in 20
96. 108 is a sacred number in Hinduism
97. Maybe I'll reach moksha?
98. O lord Ganesha
99. The One-toothed
100. the pot-bellied
101. The dog again, but we know that's a problem. Find the solution.
102. Eat sweetcakes
103. pistachio ice cream
104. NEVER dog meat
105. I still have 5 whole minutes, whoa!
106. Remover of Obstacles
107. Placer of Obstructions
108. You gotta stop somewhere, so OM.

We did not clean this up, so take it as it comes. Despite the profusion of Dawn dishsoap our partners provided us with.

If you want something dirty to clean up, mostly extracted from graffitti: