Why you should write

I began writing this article to share a manifestation list, but it some how started to mold into writing about my relationship with writing that I would love to share with you all.

My hope is that you take what you like from it.

I am going to start with a series of something that one of my favourite writers calls, "Morning Pages". About a year ago, I started reading all of Julia Cameron's books. For those of you who don't know who she is, she is a writer and teacher amongst many many things writing related, but by far she is one of my favourite writers. She has this writing exercise called "Morning pages", where the first thing you do when you wake up, is you write. 3 pages of long handwriting, whether it's on your computer, but she reccommends physical paper, because theres something powerfyl about the connection from your hand to your brain and onto the page. But since finding out about this habit or exercise rather, I've decided to adapt into my daily routine. It's also supposed to be a stream of consciousness.

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It actually started at the height of the pandemic, when I was still at home living with my parents. I call 'home', where my parents are, I guess. I live now on my own with my boyfriend, in a 2 bedroom apartment, and it's been 2 years since I moved out, and it's fair to now call this my home. I've moved a lot as a child, so to have my own space, is home for me. That's a story for another day.

Anyway, I've always been fond of writing. In fact, my relationship with writing started in the midst of high school, when I realized that I say a lot more on paper than I do verbally, and I genuinely enjoy the ease and flow of writing on paper. I wasn't writing as consistently, but I would document 'important' or significant days in my journal. If something happened in class, or someone made me feel a certain way, or simply just to get my thoughts down on paper, I would write. Whatever it may have been, I sought after writing as a form of expression. Truthful expression.

Over the course of my university years, sometimes writing would be all I would be doing in the library cubicles. I would write about how much I hate a certain class, or how my semester was going. Writing got me through a lot actually now that I think about it. I was also a bit lonely, so writing became my companion, I guess. There are journals starting from 2015 all up until 2019, when I finally completed my undergrad, and all are documented from different periods of my life.

And then covid hit.

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We couldn't go anywhere, do anything for a while, so writing became a habit. Every morning, I would dawn on it. Pour into my 3 pages. Over the years since I've started the habit, I've gotten more and more honest with myself on the page. It's just me and the page. That's all. I allow myself permission to be as free, as honest, as mean, as raw as I want. No one's going to read it. I had an English teacher who once told me, to write as if someone would read your writing for the first time, so as to be as descriptive and vivid as possible. I guess she wasn't wrong in that sense, but if it's just for you, then keep it for you. I treasure my journal. Sometimes, I feel like I'm more passionate about writing, then I am about dancing. I like both, perhaps they serve a different purpose in my life. Where dancing, is no doubt emotional and physical and I guess mental too, with writing, everything flows easily onto the page. Perhaps it's the habit, I've built for 3 years and counting. I have bins of journals and sketchbooks from way back in 2015, up until now in 2023. Words are powerful. Words carry intention and energy, believe it or not. What we say repeatedly to ourselves and believe about ourselves and the world around us through words, affects the next manifestation. Thoughts, words, actions all of it.

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So that's my relationship with writing. I can go do a day without writing, but when it does not happen, my day feels a little off. Perhaps more off than if I don't dance daily. Something switched there, I think. My dream is to perhaps still study to be a professional dancer, but I don't know why, somehow living my life on my own terms seems to be the route I'm following these days. A mix of slow and intentional living, but also passionate and artistic and gaining financial wealth from it, especially in these cold months. Did I mention, that I hate the winter here in Canada. I don't enjoy being outside, but I know it's good for us. I know nature is good for us, and I am grateful to live an earshot away from walking trails and the river. So grateful.

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But as far as the next journey goes, I'm all ready. I have my options opened and writing I feel is going to get me there. I don't know how, but somehow there is a higher power, that takes over when I write, guiding me and showing me the way. I have to trust. Like most people meditate or exercise, or whatever their form of meditation is, writing is that for me. If people wrote about their feelings as a way of processing and understanding them, man, would the world be a better place? If we managed to understand ourselves, with a bit more writing in our lives, would we develop the compassion to understand others? I wonder? I encourage it.

Also, the more you write, the better you get, like any skill you practice daily, there will be opportunities that will arise, to showcase it on another level, on a bigger scale. And there's your job. You get paid to do what you love. I love writing. But my *reality*, right now, is that I work as a ballroom and latin dance instructor. And my journey has been, well, maybe somewhat of a roller coaster and high induced anxiety caused by lots of negative thoughts. Be in between all of that, I teach people how to dance. I am short, I am brown, and I have lots of insecurites about my self, as if those are not outstanding already. But also somewhere in between that, I get to dance in front of people, and teach people some of my favourite dances - which I have come to like as all the latin dances, cha-cha, salsa, bachata etc...you get the idea. but right now my work hours are being cut because there are not enough students for all of us to teach nor are there a lot coming in. I feel at the bottom. Short pun very very intended. But in terms of experience; I feel odd sometimes, comparing myself to everyone else. I shouldn't do it. it robs you, of you. not embracing your individuality. I can dance and create work on my own terms with financial stability. It's very possible.

But anyway, because my hours are being cut, I'm looking to perhaps explore writing more and seek out writing opportunities. But keep it as a good practice. I'm taking it as a sign.

Start small and steady. And the thing is, to have no expectation, you can't be good at something if you don't try. I've learned a lot about myself through writing and documenting my life so far and maybe you will too, or find a way to serve others.

Thank you for reading. :) Happy writing:)