Why Drink Shitty Wine?

Why Do We Drink Shitty Wine?

Let me set the scene:

It’s Friday night. My Teddy Swims playlist is hitting all the right notes. (Despite me giving it my best effort, I am not hitting all the right notes with him), I am writing this while having a glass of wine. And there is no way around it-the wine sucks. I mean really shitty wine. (Truth be told, I am two glasses in-I’ll get to that in a minute.)

I bought this wine on a trip to the wine store a few weeks ago. I bought it because the label was so cool looking. A bright white background with a tie dye pattern. AND it glowed under UV light. The price of the wine should have made me put it back. I’m not a wine snob, but this was cheap. The label got me.

Fast forward to tonight. I was in the mood to disassociate from life for a few hours. A few glasses of wine, some music, a little smoke…a nice chill night. That is how I ended up two glasses into a bottle of shitty wine. But it got me thinking. Deep thoughts. And the one thing that hijacked my thoughts was what else do I settle for? Why do we, as people, sometimes (or frequently) settle for the shitty wine, instead of waiting for something better?

Instant Gratification

I think part of me is swallowed up by this culture of instant gratification. It would seem like most people are.

Our cell phones create instant contact. I remember a time when the only option to get a hold of someone was to leave a message on an answering machine.

Hook-up culture creates physical relief without the work of a relationship. (I am not sex shaming. I’ve been a part of that culture as well.)

If we want something to eat but don’t want to shop or cook? Fast food.

Need a caffeine fix? Hit a drive through like Starbuck’s or Dunkin’.

Want to watch a movie? Chances are it is found on one of many streaming platforms. I remember when we had to wait until Friday to go to Blockbuster or Family Video.

Don’t want to wait for pay day? There are banks that let you get your pay a couple days early. (I know things come up that make this option needed. There were actually a few times we needed pay early.)

Now, how many of those times did we settle for what was available at the time?

Disassociation

According to Mind.org.uk:

“Dissociation may be something that you experience for a short time while something traumatic is happening. But you also may have learned to dissociate as a way of coping with stressful experiences. This may be something that you’ve done since you were young.

Experiences of dissociation can last for a short time (hours or days) or for much longer (weeks or months).”

I think a lot of times, we make poor decisions when we are trying to disassociate. At least I know I do. With the current state of our country, actually the world, it is easy to disassociate. For me, when I get to the point that I need to disassociate to protect my mental health, I wait until I am already struggling, and then have the need, right away, to disassociate. I settle for whatever is available, including sex, binge watching movies or tv shows, marathon reading sessions, food, alcohol, weed, exercise, meditation and/or sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I do not drink often. But every now and then I indulge in a glass of my favorite whiskey or red wine.

So, back to my shitty wine. I finished the bottle, instead of waiting until the following day when we were stopping at the liquor store.

I’ve spoken to my therapist about some of my negative ways to disassociate. I have found that reading and exercising are just as effective when I need to check out.

So, how many times have you settled for what’s now instead of what’s better?